My head is a locked door.

Post Reply New Topic

Today I'm feeling especially frustrated with myself. I'm usually disappointed in how things have turned out but today was especially somber for me. I'll be honest though, I'm forcing myself to feel that way because I want to punish myself for being so ineffective. I have so many ideas in my head, so many visual and auditory concepts, things I'd love to be able to channel into a more physical representation but I just can't. I try to expand that idea into something that I might build upon but even in the simplest, most accessible case I just can't do it. And now it's like any idea that pops into my mind hits me with such resonance that I get depressed I can't act upon it.

When I really want to revisit something I've done or think about what I consider to be a unique concept my brain just starts shutting down screaming "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" in frustration. It's like I'm looking through a keyhole into this personal treasure trove but that's all I can do. I'm so easily overwhelmed that even lightly researching something I might want to do is just inconceivable. Maybe it's just an assembly line fabrication of the information age that I'm in, where I slice and dice various things I've seen and recreate something from two halves into a whole, but then again, isn't that was media is? Every book, movie, piece of artwork, it's all just built upon something else.

Have you ever felt this way? Is this typical?

A way I've found to get projects done when NOTHING else works is by making the project about how I can't do the project. I can't tell from what you say if your ideas are more creative or more fact-based but if it's anywhere on the creative side this approach might work for you.

I feel that way!!

I get this amazing idea that I think is revolutionary and that it explains whatever I'm thinking about at the time. Usually it actually is revolutionary and sometimes it's an illusion. When I want to convert my thoughts into writing or into a project or anything physical, then that "Door" shuts and I forget everything.

When I give up then the thought immediately comes back and then I try and convert it again and then it shuts again

Even just typing right now, you would not believe the trouble I am having trying to get the words out of my head. It's pathetic!