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OliveOilMom
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21 Jan 2012, 4:21 am

..


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Last edited by OliveOilMom on 21 Jan 2012, 6:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

The_Perfect_Storm
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21 Jan 2012, 5:47 am

Just say no.



MissConstrue
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21 Jan 2012, 5:49 am

The_Perfect_Storm wrote:
Just say no.


This.


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izzeme
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21 Jan 2012, 8:42 am

i would disagree solely reasoning on the way you were informed, in a 'manner of fact' method without any precurring discussion on the matter.
perhaps contact the parole officer explaining that you didn't know he was coming out, let alone live with you, before you were just told so, that is no way to surprise anyone



The_Perfect_Storm
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21 Jan 2012, 10:05 am

It's definitely a problem.

You should consult the rest of your family I suppose. Anyone would hate it if a criminal showed up one day without warning.

If it comes down to it you can always just say your husband won't permit it. Let him take the fall :wink:



OliveOilMom
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21 Jan 2012, 12:19 pm

....


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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA. ;-)

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com


Last edited by OliveOilMom on 21 Jan 2012, 6:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

The_Perfect_Storm
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21 Jan 2012, 12:30 pm

OliveOilMom wrote:
Oddly enough it's not the fact that he's a criminal that bothers me. What bothers me is there will be another person in this house. If I had another room to put him in or something that would be ok. But I don't, so he's gonna be in the livingroom all the time. And he's been in prison for about 15 years this time and so I'm sure he's used to some pretty rigid routines that I may be unwilling and unable to accomodate. I have my own routines that HE IS gonna have to learn to work around.

And he's gonna have to get a job. The second day he's out he's gotta go find a job.


I suspected that his past or personality wasn't the problem. But it's a valid argument and one that you can use if you need. 15 years is a LONG time. It's going to be extremely awkward to be around this man, not just for you but especially for your husband and daughter.

You say that you have your routines and he is going to have to conform to the rules of your house... but I wonder, are you capable of enforcing that? After all you've agreed to let the man stay with no resistance at all. This is a huge decision and you need to be honest with yourself. And even then there may likely be unexpected consequences.

You mentioned before that the man was a licensed brick mason. But he's been in jail for 15 years... who on earth would employ him?

Is there any other solution? Perhaps you can help in other ways.

I'm a slightly cynical person... I can't see any way at all that this will work in your favor. And on top of all your other problems, which I don't even know the half of but your topics have alluded to... I would say overwhelmingly that you need to do whatever you can to avoid this situation.



OliveOilMom
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21 Jan 2012, 2:02 pm

...


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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA. ;-)

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com


Last edited by OliveOilMom on 21 Jan 2012, 6:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Fnord
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21 Jan 2012, 2:15 pm

OliveOilMom wrote:
... he's been in prison all his life and he's really a nice guy...

Make up your mind - he is either a convicted felon OR he is a nice guy.

OliveOilMom wrote:
He's not related anymore ... He's my ex husbands brother.

Then he's your ex's problem, not yours.

OliveOilMom wrote:
If he doesn't have anywhere to go, they won't let him out.

Well now, that's a sticky situation ... for him!

OliveOilMom wrote:
I don't know what to do with him now. He's a brick mason and has his masters license, or he used to, so he can get a job.

Who would hire a convicted felon?

OliveOilMom wrote:
I guess he can stay on the couch till oldest daughter moves out then get her little garage apartment.

So you want to expose yourself, your son, and your teen-age daughter to a man who has been in prison all his life? Where's your sense of parental responsibility?

OliveOilMom wrote:
He called me from a cell phone that he has in there. They all have cell phones. They share them. He woke me up to tell me he's coming to live here. Well isn't that just the bees knees? I said "REALLY?" in kind of a put out way, but he said "Really babygirl, I'm coming to stay at your house!" There was nothing else I could say except "Well OK". I mean when he was out before he was there for me when I needed him, so it's only fair that I'm there for him now. Plus, Mississippi is going to execute his brother, my ex husband before too long, and I know he's upset over that.

:wall:

Tell me, is your home a single-wide or a double-wide?



smudge
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21 Jan 2012, 2:47 pm

Fnord has already said what I wanted to say. You don't owe the guy anything.



OliveOilMom
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21 Jan 2012, 3:20 pm

...


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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA. ;-)

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com


Fnord
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21 Jan 2012, 8:36 pm

@OOM: Why do you keep deleting your posts?



The_Perfect_Storm
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21 Jan 2012, 10:04 pm

Fnord wrote:
@OOM: Why do you keep deleting your posts?


Quite possibly because of you Fnord....



Fnord
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21 Jan 2012, 10:09 pm

The_Perfect_Storm wrote:
Fnord wrote:
@OOM: Why do you keep deleting your posts?
Quite possibly because of you Fnord....

Evidence, please?

:roll:



The_Perfect_Storm
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21 Jan 2012, 11:19 pm

Fnord wrote:
The_Perfect_Storm wrote:
Fnord wrote:
@OOM: Why do you keep deleting your posts?
Quite possibly because of you Fnord....

Evidence, please?

:roll:


Well, you did call her a sh***y parent.

"So you want to expose yourself, your son, and your teen-age daughter to a man who has been in prison all his life? Where's your sense of parental responsibility?"

And you seem to have ignored some of the information OOM has provided. Other than that it's just general rudeness and negativity without any real regard for actually solving the problem.



OliveOilMom
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21 Jan 2012, 11:57 pm

Ok now lets look at this logically. This is a woman who doesnt mind a man who just got out of prison for 15 years for kidnapping (not a child) and attempted murder( apparantly he has a problem following through) living with her, yet she's mad at YOU! Why don't you think about that fnord? Sleep on it and get back to me. And if your answer tomorrow disparages me in some way, say it to my face. Cause I'll f*** you up.


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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA. ;-)

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com