distraught after doctor appointment

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Hi there,
I took my son to a pediatrition yesterday as he is having alot of issues and his OT and speech therapist have suggested possible ASD.
In there referal letters it was mentioned about my diagnosis for aspergers in 2009.
Half way through the appointment he said I don't think you really have aspergers, your eye contact is too good, and I commented on the fact he was using a fountain pen.....apparently not usual aspergers behaviour either.......
On the way home and since I cannot stop crying, I am 44 and have learnt over time how I should act, constantly being told if you don't look someone in the eye they think you are lying.......I have learnt to blend in, adapt....... He doesn't know how hard it was for me to be there, he doesn't know how I struggle with everyday living..........a**hole....
I am soooo upset........
Has this happened to anyone else?? or am I just a loser,good for nothing......
Thanks,
Verticalmum

I don't quite understand where these professionals get off. Nowhere on this chart listing multiple ways of diagnosing Asperger's

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diagnosis_ ... c_criteria


(Whoops, almost forgot the chart)

is "poor" eye contact a requirement for diagnosis. There is "social interaction impairment" but that is a broad category. It is kind of infuriating to read over and over people who come to this board saying they know they have a problem with functioning in life but that the professional they saw ruled out Asperger's because they "Don't have a special interest" or "Show empathy" or "Make eye contact" or "Can speak coherently." Absolutely zero of those stereotypical behaviors, to my knowledge, are required for diagnosis. It is as if some professionals watch a TV show featuring a supposedly Aspie character and that's their whole education on the topic and if their clients don't match what they saw on TV, they're not Aspie. What happened to diagnosing by the DSM checklist at the very least, never mind investigating the possibility that even if a patient doesn't conform to DSM criteria they could still have a very related diagnosis like PDD-NOS.

First, calm down. Now, I agree with the other posters. No pediatrician is qualified to diagnose for or against spectrum disabilities. If they see signs that a patient might be on the spectrum, they can, and should refer that patient to the proper specialist.

I speak very coherently, and if I think of it, I force myself to make eye contact, but I have other, very strong Aspy traits. I don't like loud noises, have skin sensitivities, processing issues, and the time lag problems that causes. I am very non-social, miss social cues, am very uncomfortable in social gatherings, so I avoid them as much as possible. I can't stand changes in routine or plans, and tend to get very engrossed in what I am interested in doing at a given moment, to the exclusion of doing other stuff, like chores. As a child and teen I had frequent meltdowns. I continued to have them, but less often as an adult, while living with relatives. Now that I live alone, I am under less stress, so I haven't had one since I started living alone. I have other symptoms, as well.

Don't get freaked by the doctor's misdiagnosis. Whether looking for a diagnosis for yourself or your child, go to a specialist in spectrum issues, not a pediatrician.

I get told it all the time.

People are stupid, they're ignorant and they're fools.

Unless they've walked a mile in their shoes, they have NO RIGHT to question your diagnosis.

Thanks for your replys, it has made me feel better.Im glad you all agree about the eye contact thing.........soooo out dated as a diagnostic measure.

What a tool he is, to make it worse, he supposedly has knowledge of behaviour and autism in children.......
Doctors, I have no respect for there narrow minded ill informed attitudes.
Thanks again for all the replys.

Doctors whose job it is to know a little bit about everything are just that - you'll know more about autism than they do

Having said that, he was way out of line as well. a good doctor will know the limitations of their knowledge and be willing to help refer you to specialists that do know, as others have already said