Self Stimulation and Sensory Overload

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My mother makes me feel self conscious about then she blames me for feeling like s**t when she says she is trying to help me (which she isn't) and that "you choose your attitude and your perceptions". And when I leave the kitchen to go my room, she comments "Now you're going to go hide in your room again?"

Basically, she was pointing out this thing I do with my hands (called "stimming") and I was saying that I don't consciously choose to do it, and her pointing it out every time I do it really doesn't help me not do it because I don't become aware of it until she points it out.

I bring up that I've never seen anyone have a problem with my "stimming" (which I don't do all that often in public because I'm usually either looking at my surroundings or down at me phone. in this situation, I was just waiting for my oatmeal to cool down). She says that it does make people uncomfortable, even if I don't realize it. So I say "screw them, they're a**holes" (because they're being judgmental pricks who I prolly wouldn't wanna associate with). She tells me "maybe you're the a**hole" for whatever reason, and tells me in order to make friends I need to stop doing things that "scare people."

(adultish content below)
And no, stimming is not masturbating. It's just these weird gestures that involve rubbing my fingers together while making weird faces. Usually when I'm imagining things inside of my head. Funnily enough, I never do this while masturbating, despite the fact that my fantasies are often very vivid.

Sorry to say this, but I think your mother is ignorant about your traits.

I get the joke poked at me about "Going into my room", but I usually do due to boredom, and my family have no problem with me occasionally stimming due to that being a part of me.

What your mum said about you being an a***hole for stimming is not only arrogant but extremely hurtful....is your mother deeply religious? That could influence her into thinking why you appear abnormal and can't accept this fact.

I would talk to your mother personally about her hurting your feelings and to look deeper into what you have and see if she understands.

Failing that, just stand by to what you think and if she continues being arrogant about it, let her know that people are accepting and people do understand your scenario.