My "friend" choked me today

Post Reply New Topic

So I was hanging out with my friends (the main one I will be taking about is "A") and they were throwing sand and goofing off, so I spilt water on my guy friend, "A". He said, "I will never forgive you" (jokingly) and he keeps saying stop and I keep doing it to mess with him. He suddenly grabs my wrist, which hurts, and drags me while I'm standing. He then grabs me in a choke-hold and I can't breath. He meanwhile uses his foot to trip me and throw me on the ground (he falls as well, as a result) and out of spite, I throw more water at him. I then flee and he is chasing after me. After running up some stairs, I catch my breath and he finds me and says to me in a hushed voice, "If you ever do that again, I will kill you." At first I thought "A" was joking, but then I asked, "Are you serious?" and he said, rather affirmatively, "Yes." I ran up to my locker, crying. I reflected to see if there were any signs that he was kidding - there weren't any.

You need to tell a parent, teacher or even the police about this. He sounds like a very unstable person, and it doesn't seem too unrealistic to say he might kill you if you ever make him angry again. In the meantime, stop being his friend and avoid him at all costs.

I'm not sure Gail - but I think you need to think before you do something like that ever again.
Your actions speaks volumes here.
If these people are your friends and you are making them mad - maybe you need to spend some time by yourself and analyze what happened and what you need to do - or more precisely not do so it won't happen again.

I think what happened was that you crossed some type of boundary and because of your age you are confused.
As long as it was all in fun, you were ok with it.
When the other person scared you - then all of a sudden it was the other persons fault.

The other person is not going to physically kill you, they just made a threat to you because they ran out of options - ways to express to you that they were not happy with your behavior.

Apologize to that person and tell them that you are sorry and that you was out of line and that you will try to control yourself better from now on and I would bet that you will make a good enough impression on that person that they will forgive you and it will all be forgotten.

Make a big deal out of it and you might end up alone or a outcast.

See next post.

I was on LooneyTunes' side, until I realized you were female. A guy getting rough with another guy might be understandable under these circumstances, but with a girl? No. I wouldn't tell the police, though. I'd do what LooneyTunes advised, but if he ever exhibits these tendencies again, he'll have to be dealt with.

I agree, completely unacceptable behavior and this guy sounds like a woman abuser or beater, I hope he gets what is coming to him. You should cut all contact with him and tell a parent or school teacher, it might lead to further abuse from him in the future if he thinks that behavior is acceptable.

Constantly pissing someone off is a good way to bring out the psycho in them. I doubt he meant what he said, but annoying someone to breaking point makes them say out of control things. I was tempted to shove a boy out of his kayak into a river once because he wouldn't stop throwing water at me.

I wouldn't go as far as to say he's a woman abuser. It makes no difference what gender she is, the fact is she annoyed him to breaking point. I've got into physical fights with boys when I was school aged in these circumstances and I wouldn't call them woman beaters. We're all just immature.

Personally, just don't do it again.

I told the principal and now the kid is suspended (he was spoken to this morning). Today, though, he apologized in a very strange way. It was along the lines of:

I couldn't say this earlier (he couldn't because I avoided him, hehe) but I'm really sorry and I don't know if I can forgive/live with myself. I hope you'll forgive me.

Now, somewhere in there, he said this, "I think I love you." (He HAS a girlfriend)

*Take note this kid is thirteen (fourteen in a few months), taller than me, and CAN FIGHT!

Later, during lunch, I was in the school garden, trying to clear my thoughts, when he comes with three pieces of paper and I actually run from him (I don't trust him - obviously) but I stop and he gives me the paper. It turned out to be him writing about how you can "be everyone, but you have to know how to revert back to your real self" and then "you have to set up a joke just right otherwise it'll go awry" and that you can go from everything to nothing and at the end, he wrote "Melodramatic Prose by (his name, age) who (blah blah blah I forget, but it's supposed to be deep or whatever. I remember the words "give up" somewhere)"

I crumpled it up and I saw him in front of me (with his friend). He saw that I had the papers crumpled up in my hand (I was about to throw it away).

The way he approached me was very confusing. All this trouble and we aren't even dating.

He sounds like a weird kid. I would avoid him.

I think part of that note was him trying to explain that joking around is fine and dandy, but must be done right. Granted, it was up to him to say something along the lines of "No- seriously- STOP IT!" when the water thing got out of hand, rather than manhandle you.

That's just plain scary. I fear crap like that. When I was 17 I had this old guy buy me some cigarettes. He then said "Hey...come to my house, I have beer." Ever since then I've NEVER gone to that side of my city ever since then, and I look behind my shoulder all the time. I'm 21 and still fear Pedophiles.

Edit: He had this creepy grin and he followed me around Albertsons when I was there.

To me it sounds like he was just messing around and actually likes you.

Being a little rough doesn't mean anything, everyone does that as a child. Everyone also says "I'll kill you" at some point or another without meaning it literally.

It seems highly unlikely that he meant any harm.

You did the right thing by reporting him.

I suppose to protect yourself in the future, you should be careful about retaliating in response to bullying behavior, but the fact is that he started it, you responded defensively, and his counter-response was completely out of proportion to the situation and unjustified. He was in the wrong 100% and should take responsibility.

If he does not, you may want to question whether he is a true friend or not.

Some neurotypicals might disagree with my assessment but I am on your side 100%. He was in the wrong, not you.