associative thought and sexuality

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Reading about associative thought in Temple Grandins "Thinking in Pictures" was a big aha moment for me. I consider this to be a very positive trait, but it has taken me until today to realize that this way of thinking is having some serious negative consequences as well.

I am six years into my third relationship (the others where five years each), and the last couple years have been sexless. My NT partner has their own difficulties of course; but I want to focus on mine, and particularly this realization: when sex comes into my consciousness I immediately have strong negative associations. Conflict, confrontation, anxiety, embarrassment, fear, awkwardness, disappointment, depression, etcetera....

Do others have similar experience?

Anyone have any advice for me? I realize that this pattern is robbing me of the potential of rekindling my sex-life, as the flame fizzles out for me the moment that desire ignites. Help.

I'm single now but I had some bad experiences which affected subsequent relationships, I just kept trying to connect with people. There's a saying 'repetition is the mother of acceptance' which worked for me. Just keep trying it and your negative feelings will hopefully go away.

Cad

Not read it yet, think I ordered it from the library. I will let you know, but may be.