I am loitering here today because...

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I had another disastrous attempt at social integration yesterday, so now I am trying to; (a) distract myself from remembering and (b) pick up some tips for how to proceed with the rest of my life on my own - all suggestions gratefully received.

hobbies, calm people, and distance

I have always been advised to take 'baby steps' - one step at a time and build up gradually to gain confidence.

Are you the sort of person who is happy to observe in social situations, and people watch? If so, that's a helpful way to see how people interact - just make sure you don't stare at anyone or they'll feel uneasy

Also, it's always good to have people you can turn to if you need advice or support - that's where forums like this are so helpful, as you are among people who understand. No matter how daft something seems, or how awful, there's bound to be someone who has been there and come through the other side.

I agree with Danmac, but would like to add: live alone. Hobbies, a calm environment, and living alone help me. Of course the only way for me to really have a calm environment is to live alone.

I've tried having friendships, but found it too uncomfortable, and too demanding. Because of that I didn't want to put into it what the other people wanted to put into it. I find being solitary is best for me. I do occasionally socialize with relatives, I will talk to people when I am occasionally out running errands, I will say hello to the neighbors, and I like hanging out here at WP and Dear Abby, but I don't really want any more of a social life than that. Obviously, I am an introverted, hermit type person. I am not anti social, though, just non social, and I am okay with that.

Thank you Questor, Danmac and Lungirl. I 'm not sure if you will see this, but I appreciate your responses anyway.
I don't mind being on my own, though I do love to chat, but I put myself into challenging situations sometimes because I can't believe this is happening to me and I try to prove to myself that other people's negative responses to me are just in my imagination (plus I need a job).
Anyway... I'm better now so onward and upward to the next embarrassing episode LOL