WTF I'm so screwed(rant)

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Holy crap what the hell am I supposed to do I failed college, and I have loans I have to pay back with money I don't have. I mean I'm freaking out I don't know what to do. I had a recent PTSD issue thing and I don't want my weird freak outs to come up at a job.....Not to mention I have no idea how to get a job that actually pays enough to cover that. And sometimes I just want to end it all but then my family would be stuck paying my debt and they would be sad. But at the same time what good am I doing them...I'm not making it in the 'real' world that looks like a huge f***ed up joke to me.

Edit....decided some of that was not quite what i wanted to express.

If you die, your student loans are forgiven. Your parents won't have to pay.

2 thoughts:

1) Debt can be scary (at least it's scary for me) but look at it this way. People get into debt all the time to finance things they cannot afford to pay cash up-front, like cars, houses, etc. Debt can actually be a good investment. I think a little bit of debt to get an education is a good investment.

2) Talking to people and asking for help can be tough for a lot of us here on wrongplanet, maybe it is for you too, but IMHO your next step needs to be talking to anyone and everyone at your college you can find who will listen, starting with the Dean of Students. Colleges want their students to succeed and do well, because that is their entire business model. You are not the first college student to fail some classes or get in trouble with drugs. Maybe it's the first time you've been in that situation, but I guarantee there are deans/teachers/administrators/counselors/chaplains who have heard it a thousand times before and will be sympathetic.

You are an important part of wrongplanet community. Good luck!

Student loans are infinitely unimportant compared to your life. You're as much a part of the real world as anything, to name just one way you affect the world for good you've been really supportive to me and others on here and just a great person. I understand you're in an extremely tough spot, you're dealing with things most people don't have to deal with... don't beat yourself up, you're not failing as anything no matter what/who might make you feel that way, you're doing the best job you can under very difficult conditions.

If you can't take certain stress because of PTSD, you can't take it, it's the same as having any other serious condition. Not to say you can't get better with time but more stress is the last thing you need now. Can you or can you ask one of your family members to call the financial aid office and ask if the loans can be cancelled because of your PTSD and associated issues?

Debt is just Debt, what are they going to do? call you? this a a funny way of looking at it but its through
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5bbvMR8Ee4[/youtube]

Sorry, I think I may have misunderstood your situation (but my heart was in the right place ).
How long ago did you drop out of school, and do you have any interest in going back?
I have a friend who took 8 years to get his undergrad degree. The college gave him a 2nd chance, then a 3rd chance, then a 4th chance... finally he finished!

I agree with Mushroo. Don't give up on school. There is no law that says it has to be done in a specific time period, such as two or four years. Instead of over whelming yourself by taking a lot of courses at once, just take one or two classes per semester, and take as long as you need to finish school. Besides reducing stress over taking too many courses for you to handle all at once, this can help in another way. It will leave you time to take a part time job, which will help pay some of your bills. If you have been having trouble finding a job, try the employment agencies for temp work, until you finally finish school. I am older now, and no longer able to work due to other health issues, but most of my work life was temp work I got through employment agencies. The breaks between assignments let me recharge my psych batteries, and also gave me time to help out my mother with some of her stuff, so I preferred temp work, even though I didn't get paid when I was between assignments. Some assignments ran longer, though, so I managed to pay my bills. It helped that I have never been a big spender, and have no expensive vices.

I know all too well how hard it is for people on the spectrum to handle stress, and how easy it is for us to get over whelmed, but keep up with your schooling, just at a reduced number of courses at a time. That should reduce your stress. Good luck!

I have faith in you that if you can get your PTSD and drug problems under control, you can succeed in school, business, or whatever you put your mind to! Lots of successful older people struggled when they were your age. Don't give up, don't be afraid to seek counseling, have faith in yourself, good luck!

I didn't think you can be charged if you are unemployed and don't have the money... Yeesh, that can't be possible if you don't have the money...
Also when you don't want your parents to pay, is it because you want to handle it yourself or because if they do, they'll give you a hard time?