Second public meltdown in two weeks...

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Today I finally motivated myself to go down to the nearby grocery store to pick up some margarine and peanut butter. When I got to the recently expanded and over-sized store it was like I had just landed on another planet. I was walking around aimlessly instead of going to the isles where the food I wanted to get is. Finally I go to the dairy section and there is a group of women who I don't think are around here. They were wearing very bright and expensive-looking clothes and their hair was all made up. They were talking and laughing very loudly and when I looked at them they paused for a second and then started guffawing. I hate when people do that because I think they're laughing at me, even though they probably aren't I wonder what is so funny, is my fly open or something? Someone said there must be some kind of family reunion going on. Anyway I can't find the brand of margarine I normally buy so I try my luck with the peanut butter. But I don't notice this lady with her shopping cart and she practically slams it into me, banging up my arm and hand and nearly causes me to fall into it! She apologized, or tried to because she didn't speak English well, and instead of saying "that's okay" like I normally would, I hit something with my fist and then storm out of the store, but not before screaming I HATE THIS PLACE!! ! loud enough for everyone to hear.

I hate the "city" I live in, when it is not boring and isolated from the rest of the country, it is like this. Especially in the summer when tourists come visit and snarling teens and squealing kids are out of school and crowd the places. I'm so sick of it and I wish I could move. But I can't. I always seem to get more bad-tempered, anxious and depressed when the weather gets hotter. I hate the summer and I wish I could hibernate until September.

You may as well stay put where you are because all cities are the same. There are supermarkets everywhere. There are reunions everywhere. There are people laughing everywhere. There are ladies pushing shopping carts that can accidentally bump into you at any aisle everywhere.

If you have a Walmart Super store or other 24 hour grocery store, go shopping late at night or very early in the morning, when other stores are closed, and most other people are home asleep. It will be much less stressful then. I've done that myself sometimes.

I love grocery shopping but at our last grocery trip we went to the same store but a different location and I seriously just wanted to get the hell out of there. I didn't know where anything was, I couldn't enjoy it like I usually do, I was about to panic because the dairy and cheese sections were far apart and I couldn't find the cheese on my list for a second. It was so crowded. It really was not a good situation for me. So I can understand.

I don't know about where you live, but in my city we have several 24 hour supermarkets. You might try one of those. Either that or maybe go early in the morning or later at night. Having a friend to go with might help too.

The 24h and quiet_time_of_the_day advice worked well for me.
Still there is the risk of people bumping into you and those surprise visits from tourists/families that decide to have their social chicken-house hour right in front of the products you need.

I tried to forget about all the etiquette rules and just loudly state "HELLO I NEED MUESLI!" in their general direction whilst heading towards my muesli. I shut out everything then and just go for my goal and then run to the register. It feels bad in a certain way.. this is not how I was taught to behave, but I have my food and I needed that.
In a part of my brain I think that those people do not evan care if I behave nicely or weird. Still it is a battle against self-consciousness.

Physical things I have not yet found a solution for... where I am from people usually press against each other in the register queue.
I hate it.
They bump the trolleys/carts/things into you. Mostly gently, but sometimes quite hard.
They seem to think that is normal and nothing wrong with it.
I don't know what to do... I now allow myself subtle stimming, like shifting weight from 1 leg to the other. It helps me gather myself so I can do the purchase when it finally is my turn.

Another thing is earplugs. I point at them and explain that I cannot hear well.
My ears are fine, but what it boils down to is that I cannot handle their communications other than "pay please", "do you want the latest collectibles?" . So I just keep the earplugs in, and it is true that I do not hear well with them in and I refuse to take them out for social stuff.
People have responded well to this. I somehow feared they would not accept it?

Last thing is environment.
I have discovered that supermarkets vary greatly culturally and depending on the type of town you live in.
In crowded european countries, even the most remote hamlet has relatively densely populated shops compared to the remote australian place I now live in.

It is such a relief.
Don't even need the earplugs here!

No, winter is worse when you hate people because if you slip over on ice you get everybody's attention drawn to you and they laugh at you and make you feel like a freak. Well, not sure how easy people are to amuse where you are, but where I come from (Essex, UK) slipping over on ice is like breaking a social rule and people turn the situation into such a big embarrassing ordeal for you. I just wish I could hibernate from November to February. I hate the snow, can't cope with it but can't escape it. I much prefer the hot weather.

Anyway, I don't have much advice to offer but I know how you feel. I haven't had a meltdown in public before myself, but I have almost had one but used my self-control to hold it back and stay calm and cool (this is not ideal for everybody on the spectrum, since we're all different and some are more prone to meltdowns than others). But I have a feeling that in years to come I'm going to lose my temper one day in public and lash out, not violently, but just verbally. If somebody stands in my space or claims I am in their way or stares at me, those are the 3 things that get me angry, and I feel like screaming then, or giving them a good shove. But the worst I do is tut and walk away, sometimes they notice, but mostly they don't, and are just glad to steal the space where I was standing.