Was down but now...

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I know that I have to change. If life feels that bad, you can't just say about it and think it will cover over and then it all gets better.
No... the effort has to come from within. You cannot depend on others to make you feel better about yourself.
Yes, they can help you through but they can't make you happy as only you are in control of how you feel.

You are correct. As Gandhi had wisely said: "You must be the change that you wish to see."
I wish you the best of luck in achieving whatever change that you need to achieve.

Most of what happens to us in our lives is out of our control, but how we relate to it IS in our control. You're on the right track! It's a gradual change, but it is possible.

I disagree with the notion I am in control of how I feel, If I was that would be cool, but being mentally ill sometimes how I feel kind of has a mind of its own regardless of what I want. Of course I don't expect that others are going to make me happy in life. Anyways glad this works for you.

Do you have a mental illness in addition to as?
I've got a friend who is bipolar & it is tough. He meditates a lot. He says it helps, but it doesn't stop the depression.

Yeah as far as I know Anxiety, Depression and PTSD...I don't know if there is anything else there could be as sometimes I seem to have issues that none of those quite explain but maybe the three of those in combination explains some of it. Its like a rollar coaster but with no ups just downs and flat track...from what I hear bi-polar people sometimes have a quite optimistic mood I don't even get that. But you know how if you ride on a rollar coaster you aren't the one in control? that is how, how I feel works at least its how it seems.

Yes, my friend does get very up. He feels great during the mania phase, but it's hard to be around, from what I've heard.

I also have depression & PTSD. Some of it is due to the family life when I was a kid, some of it due to AS, some of it due to celiac disease (the depression, anyway). I have been able to find things to help moderate the whole complex of negative experience. My life has smoothed out to a large degree & I'd say I have more contentment. Not great joyful happiness or anything like that, but an easy-ness & ability to enjoy small pleasures, like a good book or petting the dog. Easier to get out of bed, w/stand other's BS.

I'm sorry... I did not consider people with a mental illness.
I had tunnel vision so was very focused with getting a point across...