me

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it's so hard to be happy, not to let people down, inside, if i was who i am on the inside on the outside, then i will break i heart which i could not live or stand to break. it's one thing the few that except me do, as they know im strange. but hit them with how i am would be too much for them to understand. i don't understand it. i don't want to hate me but i can't stop, have not stopped for years. i hate myself. hate. but i love you so much i can't let you see how much i hate myself. you think im something i am not. and you get strength from me. i get the will from you and you do not even know. you are the strong one not me and you don't even know it. fix

Sweet Pea hugs

I know not what to say. Perhaps if you can be more specific about what is bothering you , then someone here might be able to help.
BTW what country are you from?