Paruresis destroys my life

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Hi,

I have paruresis and it destroys my selfconfidence.
For those who don't know what it is. It is having anxiety of urinating in public.

I suffer from paruresis for almost 5 or 6 years and i'm ashamed of it.
I just can't talk about it to anyone. Not my friends nor my family, because it's some kind of taboo.
I have the feeling people won't take it seriously but in fact it is the major problem in my life.
It has become an obsession.
I can only go to my own bathroom when there is nobody around, so i don't dare to travel to far places.
When i'm somewhere at a friends place i always have to leave when i need to go to the bathroom and they sometimes ask why i leave so early. So i always have to think of an excuse.

Talking about this with a therapist seems no option, because it's to shamefull.
I feel worthless when people say: "I have to pea" and they just turn around and empty their bladder.
I wish I could do that. It is pure psychological.
If i'm alone at home there is no problem. When there are people around I just can't go

Are there more people on this forum with paruresis or people who suffered from it?
Does anyone have tips for me on how to overcome this anxiety?

Help would be appreciated.

The subject is not really supposed to be discussed according to forum guidelines but if you find yourself straining to get everything out it can cause worse medical problems later on in life. Remind yourself that everyone needs to relieve themselves and if you need to 'go' when you're visiting friends you can excuse yourself by saying "I need to see a man about a horse" or a similar euphemistic phrase. Increase your intake of things that cause to pressure to build to the point where 'the pain is greater than the fear' and once that shark has been jumped it will become a more natural part of functioning

Ah man, I can definitely empathize with you on this one...It's not nearly as debilitating for me and was more of a serious issue as a child but let's see, in elementary school, I was too scared to use the pubic restrooms and spent every single day of all seven years (including Kindergarten) holding it until I got home, ha. It was miserable and meant that I generally refrained from drinking any water at school. Other times, like at one sleep-over, I refused to use the bathroom in a friend's house and had to go through the same issue. At about sixteen or seventeen, I managed to start slowly working through it by (and this is weird) consciously awarding myself each time I used a public bathroom. Good god, this sounds a lot weirder typed than in my head, haha, but anyway...things like, "if you can do this (and I'd always use a stall instead of urinal) you can buy yourself 'insert object I'm obsessed with'" I worked on it all the time until by 19, I was pretty much completely over it and though I find urinals and public bathrooms incredibly uncomfortable, I can endure 'em for the sake of future comfort. My advice would be to definitely seek help...it's too much of a burden to endure, man. Whatever it takes since it sounds like this is one of the major things affecting your social life.