My personal series of unfortunate events

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AmazingMess
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 19 Jun 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 74

06 Mar 2013, 5:35 pm

Here is a short story of my life in the past 10 months.
starting in June...
got in a minor car accident. lost my car.
got in a major motorcycle accident. $75,000 of medical bills and counting. have never had health insurance.
moved into a house with roommates. landlord makes me get rid of my cat who is the best cat i've ever owned.
job goes to s**t, have multiple managers and coworkers who bully and harass me repeatedly.
(job is cleaning up dog mess all day for $7.65 an hour)
truck that boyfriend bought breaks down on the way to one of my dentist appointments, no longer driveable.
no vehicle.
finally quit my job, can't stand working like that anymore.
just got kicked out this morning, (have to move out by april 1st) reasons given are "disrespect and unemployment". even though it was never on the lease that i have to be employed, even though i've been paying rent on time ever since i quit my job. as well as the fact that i've actually been trying to be nice to my roommate whom i have disagreements with.
and still waiting to get settlement money from the accident. have to move in with my mom which i didn't want to do because i don't want to put any pressure on her at all.
still currently missing two teeth from the accident and still have a displaced pelvis from the fracture. probably will have to get rid of my dog. probably can't even get my cat back from my friend who's taking care of her.
i've been waiting and waiting for something to get better, something to look up in my life and when i almost can see a possibility, something else goes wrong.

what am i supposed to tell myself when i want to stop trying to move forward?

2wheels4ever
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 3 May 2012
Age: 54
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,694
Location: In The Wind

07 Mar 2013, 1:12 am

John Lennon sure said it best: "nobody told me there'd be days like these" - I've gone through what you have, almost verbatim. This is one of those times where if you don't have something to cast your spiritual lot in with, you're screwed, not just in the here and now but in the Big Picture.

Hopefully the MC accident case gets resolved soon so you can get back as close to physically 100% again. Trying to work, and figure out a place to live AND a way to get around all at once is bad enough when you're fully able-bodied, trying to do that all in your condition is a recipe for getting further irreversibly 'tore up'

For now, focus on getting your health back, which will be less complicated if you can stay somewhere without the drama. BTW, if certain recreational substances had a factor in lapse of judgment that led to the 2 consecutive collisions it would be a good indicator that nothing good comes from those indulgences. Not saying, just if. It does happen.

6 months ago I was in a lull, trying to do everything right and having it all come out wrong. What helped get me out of it was coming to WP, moaning about it on The Haven and my church friends, seeing a therapist and 'rebooting in last known good configuration' - there were a few special interests I'd been neglecting

_________________
Let's go on out and take a moped ride, and all your friends will thing your brain is fried, but you can't live your life too dirty, 'cause in the the end you're born to go 30

Toy_Soldier
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Jul 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,370

07 Mar 2013, 6:54 am

AmazingMess wrote:

Here is a short story of my life in the past 10 months.
starting in June...
got in a minor car accident. lost my car.
got in a major motorcycle accident. $75,000 of medical bills and counting. have never had health insurance.
moved into a house with roommates. landlord makes me get rid of my cat who is the best cat i've ever owned.
job goes to sh**, have multiple managers and coworkers who bully and harass me repeatedly.
(job is cleaning up dog mess all day for $7.65 an hour)
truck that boyfriend bought breaks down on the way to one of my dentist appointments, no longer driveable.
no vehicle.
finally quit my job, can't stand working like that anymore.
just got kicked out this morning, (have to move out by april 1st) reasons given are "disrespect and unemployment". even though it was never on the lease that i have to be employed, even though i've been paying rent on time ever since i quit my job. as well as the fact that i've actually been trying to be nice to my roommate whom i have disagreements with.
and still waiting to get settlement money from the accident. have to move in with my mom which i didn't want to do because i don't want to put any pressure on her at all.
still currently missing two teeth from the accident and still have a displaced pelvis from the fracture. probably will have to get rid of my dog. probably can't even get my cat back from my friend who's taking care of her.
i've been waiting and waiting for something to get better, something to look up in my life and when i almost can see a possibility, something else goes wrong.

what am i supposed to tell myself when i want to stop trying to move forward?

Sometimes its easier to find reasons in the others around you. Even your pets. Keep going, to get your cat back, keep going to keep your dog, keep going to assist your mom. There are times when the crappy things pile up & you can't keep up with them. But time keeps going and eventually you will take care of things you put off now. If you get settlement money, you can get the dental work, etc.

Geekonychus
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 15 Nov 2012
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,660

07 Mar 2013, 11:17 am

You have pretty cool hair........That's something! :wink:

mikassyna
Veteran
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Joined: 4 Feb 2013
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,319
Location: New York, NY

07 Mar 2013, 11:36 am

AmazingMess wrote:

got in a major motorcycle accident. $75,000 of medical bills and counting. have never had health insurance.

AmazingMess wrote:

what am i supposed to tell myself when i want to stop trying to move forward?

Make a call to the hospital. They can reduce the amount you owe significantly. They will also work out a payment plan for you but you must state your financial situation as well as -- here is where your Dx can come in handy -- reasons why you are having trouble finding gainful employment to pay them.

They will very likely forgive much of the debt and negotiate something reasonable with you. Don't despair, and good luck!

AmazingMess
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 19 Jun 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 74

07 Mar 2013, 4:57 pm

Thanks for all your encouragement...

2wheels4ever wrote:

BTW, if certain recreational substances had a factor in lapse of judgment that led to the 2 consecutive collisions it would be a good indicator that nothing good comes from those indulgences. Not saying, just if. It does happen.

That's just the thing - no substances were involved in either accident. Both happened on a totally normal day, middle of the day, nothing wrong and no lapse of judgement... it was just.. fate.

Toy_Soldier wrote:

This is very wise advice. Thank you, I'll try to keep it in mind. It sounds like I'll be getting my cat back and I think I found a friend's house nearby where my dog can go. I'm feeling a little better today.

Geekonychus wrote:

You have pretty cool hair........That's something! Wink

Thank you :p that picture is from quite a while ago, but it was a lot of fun. Only lasted a little while.

mikassyna wrote:

They will also work out a payment plan for you but you must state your financial situation as well as -- here is where your Dx can come in handy -- reasons why you are having trouble finding gainful employment to pay them.

Unfortunately, I don't have a Dx (by which I'm guessing you mean diagnosis). I'm self-diagnosed, and I fear that, unless I were to be examined by the most understanding and knowledgeable about Asperger's psychiatrist, I would be labeled as neurotypical or something like that. I'm also terrified of making phone calls and I've had lots of trouble in the past getting in contact with the right people in that hospital. But... I think I have another solution for getting my bills paid, despite that. (Which is one good thing among all the rest.)

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