Constantly misunderstood, belittled, and insulted

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People are constantly telling me I'm a jerk. I will ask them WHY they think I'm a jerk and they always have the same response:

"I don't know, you're just kind of weird"

And I'll say, "okay, I get that, but how does being weird make me a jerk?"

And again, same answer, "I don't know, you just rub me the wrong way".


They never seem to have any concrete examples. It's always a "vibe" they get, not bad/rude behaviour on my part.

A lot of people also think I'm very nice, compassionate, and empathetic. But weird.

It always brings me down, alienates me. Makes me avoid socializing.


I'm sorry. This is my first post and I'm venting. Not the best way to introduce myself, I realize that.


How do I help people... to stop hating me so much, for no logical, rational reason? I haven't done anything wrong. They're hating on me because of a "vibe"!

I'm sorry you have to deal with that. It seems pretty clear to me that they're the obvious jerks. If they can't provide a reason other than a vibe, than all you can say is "I'm sorry you feel that way, I'm not trying to be a jerk" and leave it at that. Some people are just judgmental, and believe in crazy voodoo like "vibes". Just try not to let it get to you.

Welcome!

Those are the same issues many of struggle with all our lives. It could be something as minor as your body language, tone of voice, speaking awkwardly or out of turn, eye contact, and so on.

And NT's normally will reject anyone who's a bit more different than themselves.

For me, the only thing which helped was to intensively study people and read all I could about Communication. After a few years of this, people almost were unable to tell that I gave them these mysterious "vibes".

But it's a trained mask, like I'm an actor playing a role. It wears me out to act that way, naturally. But on the other hand, I've gotten to be a good actor.

Good luck!!