I'd do anything to go back...

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I'd do anything to be able to go back to Vermont. I've been back in my hometown for only two weeks now, and it's already depressing the f**k out of me. I have nothing and no one here... I don't talk to anyone from high school anymore (not that I ever had any real friends while I was in high school)... seriously, the only people outside of my immediate family that I've spoken to in the past two weeks are friends from college. Apart from going running, I've spent the better part of the past two weeks staring at my computer, either fruitlessly trying to relive my time in college or trying to figure out a way to move back there. This is no way to live...

I had it all until two weeks ago yesterday... my own place, freedom to do what I want, when I want, gainful employment, and perhaps most importantly, people who actually appreciated my presence and wanted me around... a great group of friends, who, even though there was more f****d up drama than the average soap opera, in the end supported each other no matter what. I actually feel more comfortable around those people than I do with my own blood related family. Whenever I come back to this New York hellhole, I feel tolerated, but not like anyone really wants me here.

God... I need to get out of this damn house...