Long time absentee returning for a little while

Post Reply New Topic

This aint my catch up post, but just feeling blue right now. Feelin blue. had my 33rd bday a month and a half ago. Still single, never had a girlfriend all that stupid s**t.

Don't usually bother me, i got enough to do without worrying about that. Just hit me lonely today. Had a date a few nights ago off an asexuality dating site. Woman was very demeaning. Had some kinda illness, can't remember what, that meant sexual contact was painful for her. So she wasn't seeking a sexual/intimate relationship. I explored the possibility, and all was going alright. I've practiced my social skills for god knows how long so I'm quite good at that sorta stuff now.

End of night arrives, and she goes to give me a hug good bye. I wasn't even entertaining a kiss. But she hugged me for quite a while and I was getting uncomfortable, so I kinda shrugged her off. Not violently or even (I thought) all that insistently, but enough to know that hug was over. Well, NT's being NT's she took that as i wasn't into her at all. I called her last night to catch up and plan a second date, and she made plain it wasn't gonna work.

I can see in hindsight after reading emails prior to setting up date that she wanted an NT male that would do EVERYTHING except sexual contact. but I kinda had hopes that I might finally get a girlfriend. And tonight I'm feeling blue, and have had a few drinks where as I usually don't have any.

Well, i said what I had to say and i feel marginally better for having said it.

Cheers,
Izaak.

Hi, Welcome back to WP.

And I think I might experience something similar. I sometimes feel blue and down after there's someone who's different that I could be friends with, but for various reasons and sometimes unfair reasons things don't work out.

And she jumped levels. She didn't take it medium steps, ping ponging back and forth communication.

It's like what she did was a jump with guesswork.

Hi Izaak, nice seeing you again. I used to be Greentea. You have to be thick-skinned to do the dating game, because the trick is to not get down after each failed start so it won't set you back and you'll go for bulk till you find the one. I'm not able to take each failed start in stride, so I don't look for a special someone.

As you say, this woman wants physical closeness and you don't, so maybe next time you could clarify expectations before a date...