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OliveOilMom
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23 Jul 2013, 5:47 am

As you all know I've been going through some crap. Last night I talked to Ole Boy. He asked me to move in with him. I'm going to.


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EmberEyes
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23 Jul 2013, 5:56 am

I hope this will let your life calm down a little. You seem to have an awful lot going on right now. Good luck!



OliveOilMom
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23 Jul 2013, 6:03 am

Well, it's going to shake things up a bit here at first, but I think it'll be better. It's such a hard decision. Last night though, on the phone he told me how much he wanted me to be with him and live with him and that he loves me and that my husband isn't treating me right he don't think and he just said he wanted to fix things for me. I asked him if he was for real or if this was just bs, and he said it's for real. He said he's had feelings for me for a long time now, so maybe so.

It's a very hard decision, to leave the husband of 26 years and father of my kids to be with this other guy but it feels right. Plus, I think that you regret the lost chances more than the mistakes.


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Ann2011
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23 Jul 2013, 9:20 am

Glad you're feeling better.



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24 Jul 2013, 12:40 pm

I'm hoping for you to be happy and loved.


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BuyerBeware
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24 Jul 2013, 5:33 pm

Hoping for you to be happy.

But.

I'm sorry, I have to tell you that this sounds like an out-and-out BAD IDEA.

If things aren't working and he wants to make trouble for you, moving in with another guy is like giving him trouble on a golden platter. He can HURT you with that s**t. Seen it before.

Also, I people meant half the things they say they mean, the world would be a much better place. It isn't.

If you want out, get out. File for divorce and wait for it to come through. THEN shack up with your boyfriend.

Don't mean to be a killjoy.

Wish you all the best.


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OliveOilMom
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24 Jul 2013, 6:26 pm

Well I've given it some more thought and as much as I'd like to go, I have to wait for things to get fixed around here regarding my son right now. He's grown but still lives at home and there's some stuff I need to put a stop to and am, which his dad wouldn't do.

As for DH causing problems for me, as in hurting me, he's been handsy before but he isn't the type to ever do anything like that around another man, because he can't fight. Especially he wouldn't do it around Ole Boy, cause everybody around here knows how he gets. But, that could be out of the frying pan and into the fire right now because I want proof that he's going to keep taking his crazy pills and straighten up before I go. Just because he is taking them now doesn't mean he will be next week or next month or whatever. He's gotta prove it, cause he's said it before.

It's just that when I get like I was the other night, so crazy and crying and not even able to think straight and just hysterical, it seemed like a better idea than it was. Maybe there is a future for us, I don't know, he says there is, but he's gonna have to show me what it's gonna be like by being that way for a while first.

There's a lot more to it than I've gone into here. Right now DH is gone, and he's gone cause he was being douche and I told him to just go for now.


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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA. ;-)

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BuyerBeware
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25 Jul 2013, 7:49 am

I don't know about getting handsy-- Don't suppose anything will stop that if he wants to give you a good beating.

You're in TX, right?? Get a CCW. That'll stop him if he wants to thrash you. Doubt you could bring yourself to shoot the father of your kids, but-- Just knowing it's there is a hell of a deterrent.

My worry would be him using the law to screw you over if he can prove you've taken up with someone while still legally wed. My hubby has threatened it before-- not that I've taken up with anyone, but just the accusation can be enough to ruin a woman's life.

Happened to a friend of mine. Her megalomaniacal hubby accused her of adultery (prolly helped that his mom smoked dope with the family court judge, but hey). Next thing she knew, she was paying his mortgage, buying his groceries, paying him alimony, and bringing him beer and letting him ass-rape her so he would allow her to spend a few minutes with their kid.

No joke. PLEASE don't put yourself at risk of something like that.


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OliveOilMom
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25 Jul 2013, 8:43 am

No, not Tx. Deep South. Small town. And I can't legally own a gun of my own anymore cause of a couple of assault convictions a few years ago for fighting back with DH (no weapons involved).

Eh, I don't know what DH would do. I've got so much stuff on him that he couldn't take this one thing and use it on me cause I've got proof that he's done it quite a bunch. But, like I said, I just have to give it some thought. He's known about this for the past couple years anyway. There was an incident last year where he showed up over there and wanted me back home (after he had been a douche and wanted me to leave and all that) and then both of them told me they cared and I picked DH but tried to stay friends with Ole Boy, but while there's no sex anymore, there's more feelings.

He knows that he's got a rival and he's civil to him. His son hangs out with DH. Weird, yes I know, but small town.

As for guns, Ole Boy can't legally own one anymore either. And DH is terrified of them and won't handle or shoot them because he doesn't know how.

I'm waiting it out. Right now my kids are my concern, this thing with my son came up and I have to deal with it, plus schools fixing to start and all for my daughter and I'm gonna give it some time. In a fit of hysterical craziness I might be willing to through away 26 years like that, but now that I'm back to my senses I want to wait and talk to both of them and see. If DH can straighten up, I'll probably stay here.


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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA. ;-)

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com


BuyerBeware
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26 Jul 2013, 12:48 pm

As long as you've got you ass covered, dear one. As long as you've got your ass covered.

Other than that, just make sure you can face the mirror next time you have to brush your teeth.


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"Alas, our dried voices when we whisper together are quiet and meaningless, as wind in dry grass, or rats' feet over broken glass in our dry cellar." --TS Eliot, "The Hollow Men"