I'll try this here...

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I hate my life, I end up spending most of my time sitting in my room at my moms house on the internet. I have an SSI hearing next month so in a couple weeks and will find out if I got that or have to appeal again. The problem is I don't want to appeal another SSI denial for a year...I can't continue life in this manner. So I am seriously thinking if I get denied and have to appeal I might just put out some job applications and see if I find something...I don't see why I'd be denied again or who would hire me if I am, but something seriously has to change. And I need some form of income to do that. I am just sick of being broke living at my moms house with her and her boyfriend arguing every other day.

Hey, it's you Sweetleaf! I didn't recognize you with your new userpic.

You and me both! My hearing is in six weeks. I'm coming up on two years since I applied; it's ridiculous. Have you got a lawyer?

Yeah I changed it pretty recently...thinking of taking another of myself to use for my default, but I think I'd prefer to shower first as my hair needs washed.

Yeah I got a lawyer for the hearing, just waiting on some paper work from my therapist and psychiatrist...I might have to call and find out if they finished it yet. But yeah I just don't know what I am going to do if I get denied again. I'd like to think I could just go find a job, but if that where the case I wouldn't be applying for SSI in the first place.

I just really hope it works out, but I am almost afraid to get my hopes up about it.

I hope you get SSI. if you don't, you can appeal AND apply for jobs. limited part-time work won't even necessarily work against you getting benefits.

and if you try to work and fail, that can work in your favor with SSA.

I hope you get approved this time! I have the same fear, if I lose financial support from my ex-husband... What if I'm denied SSI, and I'm unable to function in a job?

Anyway I sure hope they approve you, and you can put this uncertainty behind you!

I would try and not think much beyond the hearing at this point. Mostly make sure all is done and ready for it, by you, doctors, etc. Just focus on getting it. Then if it is denied make your plan for the coming year, and I think at least trying part-time work would be a good idea. Even if you get it, a certain ammount of hours are allowed. It doesn't have to be work per-se either, but possibly volunteer work. Charity or save the green butt yellow eyed salmon fish or something. You can always use your last avatar pic. It was quite good I thought.

....

When I couldn't work anymore due to social anxiety, I was temporarily approved for a disability pension. I had to re-apply for it several times before they finally approved it on a permanent basis. Here is what I did in my final application form: I claimed that I had experienced several paranoid episodes during which I heard voices, felt extreme panic, perceived everything around me as threatening, and generally felt that I couldn't trust my senses anymore. I wrote that I doubted my autism & anxiety diagnosis and had the feeling that I might be suffering from something more severe.

In order to convince them of my alleged schizophrenia or bipolar disorder, I threw in some rather weird words and used convoluted grammar. Occasionally I'd use a word that didn't make a lick of sense in the context of the sentence and cross it out. I wrote as if my thoughts trailed off and occasionally repeated myself. I deliberately ran out of space, then turned the form around by 90° and continued to write on the border in increasingly small letters. It had to look as if I had trouble thinking straight and was struggling to put rather convoluted thoughts into words. But I also tried not to lay it on too thick. After all, I didn't want anyone to think that I might not be able to look after myself anymore.

I should probably mention that I don't live in the UK or US, so I can't guarantee that this works for you. All I know is that it worked in my case. If you feel that this is some kind of fraud, look at it this way: If you break something, you have to pay for it. Society broke me, now it has to pay up. My pension payments aren't welfare to me, they're reparations for a crappy childhood followed by decades of bullying and discrimination. It's a well-earned compensation for pain and suffering.

Yeah I am trying not to dwell on it too much, as that only really serves to make me anxious about it. Also at this point volunteer work doesn't do me much good as it still leaves me with no income....if I got on SSI though then I was thinking of volunteering at an animal shelter.