A bee in the bonnet

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Had a rough couple days of self-analysis and the fruit of it really comes down to a relatively short sarcastic quip.

If you're a relatlively well adjusted, successful, and intelligent person with relatively little social trouble - people have one way of treating you. If you have Downs Syndrome or some kind of quite definite form of, I don't even know what the appropriate term is, alternate development? People also have a way of treating you.

Now on the other hand, if you occupy two mutually exclusive zones at both opposite ends of the spectrum - you seem to have the power to make the world around you go crazy as all their mental gears run aground, crash into each other, and you can just about see the sparks and springs flying out of their ears and their eyes fly the Microsoft blue-screen. It's as if everything they think they know about reality gets accosted and violently so. That's not like being the nail that sticks out getting hammered down, it's a bit more like naturally sweating a cloud of mace that drifts out to anyone near you. Don Marquise once said that if you make people think they're thinking they love you, if you actually make people think they hate you, and we make people think - intensely - just by breathing within enough feet of them to be noticed.

I don't want to spend the rest of my life hiding from people who don't know me out of consideration that my disability causes their brains to do violence to themselves. It's just that wow...... it's really a hell of a thing to figure out how to make it work any other way.

this hermit "speaking" from his tin can in the woods looks up to people like you who are relatively heroic just by continuing to fight the good fight with society.

I know exactly what you mean about practically seeing cogs and springs and gears start to grind and explode and fly out of people's brains when that moment comes when they realize I'm not what they thought they were dealing with, yep....

people tend to see me as a quick disposable read, and even before I open my mouth they have dismissed me before I'm aware.