Every aspect of my life is pathetic
I'm in my first semester in college, and I'm having trouble adapting. If I slip up, my financial assitance taken away.
My social life is barely existent, and I haven't made any friends in school.
I'm trying to find a job, but it's so impossible!
I'm broke. I have, like, 40 dollars to my name.
My first dating prospect fell through recently, and it's been very upsetting. I really think I failed at my only chance to be in a relationship.
My family are cold and apathetic. I never feel more alone than when I'm with them.
I'm gaining weight again, overwhelmed by anxieties, and extremely close to a complete meltdown.
Hello, Sir,
What college are you going to?
You've just started school! And you'll have many opportunities for a social life. I understand your anxiety. But things don't happen overnight.
Take a few deep breaths...and relax.
Maybe call those friends whom you went to the beach with.
What classes you do have tomorrow? Study for those classes.
Follow the syllabi you were given by the professors until you get the hang of things. If you do that, and show up to class, you're almost guaranteed a "C" just for showing up.
People fail because THEY DON'T SHOW UP FOR CLASS.
What is the GPA requirement for your scholarship/financial aid?
What classes are you taking? I assume you're taking an English Composition course. What other courses are you taking?
I know the feeling. I've been through phases when I felt like I spent all of my time trying not to look so pathetic.
I've never felt lonely except when I was in a relationship that wasn't working. When I'm alone and not hoping for anything, I'm fine.
One thing that really works for me, believe it or not, is spending time in a place on the internet called "Second Life." Among other things, it lets you practice socializing in a way that's not so intimidating. For a lot of reasons, I think all Aspies should try it. It's the bunny slope of romance.
The worst that can happen is that you don't like it and quit.
On second thought, the worst that can happen is that you will like it too much and it will cut into your homework time. Try not to get too addicted.
If you go, send me a PM here and I'll tell you my on-line name. It's good to have someone to show you the ropes at first, although you won't want to hang out with an old lady like me for very long.
People fail because THEY DON'T SHOW UP FOR CLASS.
Very good advice.
One thing that can help is to show up to the prof's office during his office hours and ask some fairly decent questions. Very few students ever show up to ask questions -- when someone does show up, the profs tend to remember them. Back when I taught college math, I even had one entire year when not a single student ever came by to ask about anything during office hours!
Depending on the prof, this could be worth an extra letter grade. At the very least, it should get you the benefit of the doubt if it is close.
Depending on the prof, this could be worth an extra letter grade. At the very least, it should get you the benefit of the doubt if it is close.
Great point. If you do this then, even if you don't do that well on the exam, the professor is far more likely to be lenient, because they know you genuinely made an effort, unlike many others.
Also, show up on time. You probably already do, but I'm mentioning it just in case. They notice! If they have to make a subjective decision about grades (which they usually do, unless it's a multiple choice test) then this may just tip the scales in your favour.
As for the "only chance to be in a relationship"... I'm the last guy to be optimistic about these things, but even I would say that at the age of 18 it's extremely unlikely to be your last chance!
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What college are you going to?
You've just started school! And you'll have many opportunities for a social life. abderstand your anxiety. But things don't happen overnight.
Take a few deep breaths...and relax.
Maybe call those friends whom you went to the beach with.
What classes you do have tomorrow? Study for those classes.
Follow the syllabi you were given by the professors until you get the hang of things. If you do that, and show up to class, you're almost guaranteed a "C" just for showing up.
People fail because THEY DON'T SHOW UP FOR CLASS.
What is the GPA requirement for your scholarship/financial aid?
What classes are you taking? I assume you're taking an English Composition course. What other courses are you taking?
I'm in community college.
My problem is not attendance. The class I'm worried about screwing up is Math (or as I call it, Those things you count with) we Have a quiz, literally EVERY DAY!! !! ! And the quizzes tend to be mostly multiple choice, and my answers tend to be guesses.
I have a few friends, but I'm worried That I'm spending too much time around them, because I'm sure they'll be sick of me soon, I'm mostly a Socially awkward tag along, they'll probably find me annoying and intolerable if I hang around too much.
Please, my friend, stop creating negative self-fulfilling prophecies for yourself.
It's the Bane of the Aspie, really, those negative self-fulfilling prophecies!
Just make sure you're in tune with what your friends are talking about, and you'll be okay. Don't lecture them on anything.
What sort of math are you taking?
Depending on the prof, this could be worth an extra letter grade. At the very least, it should get you the benefit of the doubt if it is close.
Great point. If you do this then, even if you don't do that well on the exam, the professor is far more likely to be lenient, because they know you genuinely made an effort, unlike many others.
Also, show up on time. You probably already do, but I'm mentioning it just in case. They notice! If they have to make a subjective decision about grades (which they usually do, unless it's a multiple choice test) then this may just tip the scales in your favour.
As for the "only chance to be in a relationship"... I'm the last guy to be optimistic about these things, but even I would say that at the age of 18 it's extremely unlikely to be your last chance![/quote]
My body Shows up, but even when I take an extra Ritalin, I just cannot focus.
And yeah, I've never dated, and if I ever do, it probably won't be in the next few years
It's the Bane of the Aspie, really, those negative self-fulfilling prophecies!
Just make sure you're in tune with what your friends are talking about, and you'll be okay. Don't lecture them on anything.
What sort of math are you taking?
They tested me in admissions, and I'm Not in the lowest level math, but it's 0 credits, since its not college level math (pretty sad. I took College Algebra in 11th Grade. To show how bad i am: i scored low on the math placement test, but they allow one do over. So i studied three days straight, and scored LOWER the second time)
I often feel like a third wheel if I'm hanging out with my friend and they're significant other. And they're all older than me, so i don't want to be seen as the clueless kid who hangs around that they can't get rid of
I've never felt lonely except when I was in a relationship that wasn't working. When I'm alone and not hoping for anything, I'm fine.
One thing that really works for me, believe it or not, is spending time in a place on the internet called "Second Life." Among other things, it lets you practice socializing in a way that's not so intimidating. For a lot of reasons, I think all Aspies should try it. It's the bunny slope of romance.
The worst that can happen is that you don't like it and quit.
On second thought, the worst that can happen is that you will like it too much and it will cut into your homework time. Try not to get too addicted.
If you go, send me a PM here and I'll tell you my on-line name. It's good to have someone to show you the ropes at first, although you won't want to hang out with an old lady like me for very long.
Thanks, but I don't really have that much free time.
Plus my home modem is broken, so no internet.
And my brand new, very expensive laptop stopped working, so all I have is my phone (which has been replaced three times since the last week of June.)
Even technologically, things aren't going great
At least you had college algebra in 11th grade. You could benefit from that, without even knowing it. Just make sure you know the proper formulae, and practice doing the problems making use of the formulae.
You're not having problems in your other courses, right?
If you have a "special interest" (or even you're somewhat interested in the topic), I would join a club dedicated to that topic. There, you'd be first wheel.
You're not having problems in your other courses, right?
If you have a "special interest" (or even you're somewhat interested in the topic), I would join a club dedicated to that topic. There, you'd be first wheel.
I have an "orientation" course.
I have an anthropology course, which is just lectures.
I have an English course. I told my teacher I write sonnets, and she wants me to bring one in. I haven't written anything good in a long time though.
And Theatre. I love acting, but the play this year is A Raisin in the Sun which has one white male role (the rest of the cast is African American.) I always get a role, but never the one I audition for. But now, if I don't get that role, I can't get any.
My special interests are all dried up. I haven't written any poetry lately, and even my old stuff I feel less confident in.
I loved reading, a hundred books a year it used to be, but I haven't been able to read anything in over a year now.
Writing sonnets takes ability. Have you shared any of your work on WrongPlanet? I think you once wrote out a sermon you were giving to a congregation.
It sounds like you're establish a good rapport with your English professor--that should improve any grade.
Anthropology is a breeze to me. There's no textbooks in that class? If not, I'd make sure I take thorough notes. I'm sure it's an intro course; provided that you follow the syllabus, you should do well.
Sometimes, they'll give a "black" role to a white person, and vice versa. Otherwise, irritating as this might be, you could learn how to manipulate scenery, and learn what happens behind the scenes of a play. A valuable learning experience, in my book.
As for your poetry, you could always revise what you've written. You're older now, and have more experiences. This should only enhance your poetry.
It sounds like you're establish a good rapport with your English professor--that should improve any grade.
Anthropology is a breeze to me. There's no textbooks in that class? If not, I'd make sure I take thorough notes. I'm sure it's an intro course; provided that you follow the syllabus, you should do well.
Sometimes, they'll give a "black" role to a white person, and vice versa. Otherwise, irritating as this might be, you could learn how to manipulate scenery, and learn what happens behind the scenes of a play. A valuable learning experience, in my book.
As for your poetry, you could always revise what you've written. You're older now, and have more experiences. This should only enhance your poetry.
I've shared a few of my work here. None of it's older than 12 months, though, that's when I really started.
They aren't going to be lenient in the show, only one white role, and that's it. (If we do 1776, that's almost all white men, I'd certainly get a role, even if a non-singing role. But they're not having a plethora of background charachters, so it's this role or nothing
