I am a burden

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My sister just blocked me on Facebook because she thinks I act selfishly toward my mum. I think I have. I unload all the burdens that I have, all the scariness, anxiety, and obsessiveness onto mum. This makes mum not happy.

Nevertheless, if I can't talk to her, then who can I talk to (other than a therapist)?

Something I do is write my worries on paper, and then ripping them up and setting them on fire. I find writing amazingly therapeutic, and you don't have to worry about people judging you for it, or sharing things you'd rather not have shared.

If you find that writing doesn't exactly cut it, there are plenty of places you can call (I cannot provide phone numbers as I don't know where you live) and you can rant all you want for free or for a decent price. There's online, where it could end up being recorded, but usually on a good website it won't be. Of course, you can try PMing someone here or talking to a different person in real life.

If you feel that you burden your family, try to figure out other ways to unload that doesn't involve them. You can also take out emotions like anger through sports, which can help reduce you getting them in the first place.

All can be solved. It might take a while, but things do get better!

I find posting about things here helps me when I have/had problems. I felt like a burden alot too but not so much nowadays due to life getting better & having a girlfriend I can talk to. Your welcome to PM me if you'd like an online friend to talk to.

Please cut down on dumping on your Mom. As you are now finding out, it is having a negative effect on your family relationships. Instead, do try posting rants here--just ID them as venting rants, so people will understand. Also, as WellThatsDantastic posted, do try writing your rants down and then tearing them up, or you could set up an alternate email account, and send them to your alternate account. But remember, anything you put online, might one day be seen by others, so be careful what you say. If your relatives might see what you are emailing to yourself, then that may not be a good idea. You can still post here at WP, though.

Maybe I'll post it here. This is something that has been infuriating me over the past day or so:

My benefits department told me sex reassignment surgery wasn't covered because it wasn't specifically listed as covered. This is ridiculous, because many surgeries like tonsillectomy, appendectomy, gall bladder surgery, etc., are also not specifically listed as covered, but I would not expect the insurance to say it was not covered.

Sex reassignment surgery falls under "Surgery performed by a physician," which is listed as covered, so of course it's covered, as long as it's not specifically excluded (and it's not).

It's this kind of insane troll logic that I have to deal with as a trans person everyday. It really grates on my nerves.

Why don't people have more respect for us and our needs? Why do they have to fill us with doubt using such tortured logic?

I get why your upset ben. Insurance considers it cosmetic & not medically necessary because it's not causing physical harm but they don't get the mental harm that it causes. I'm not trans or anything so me nor them or anyone else who isn't can fully grasp the mental pain your in. It really sux & I don't have any advice here but I really hope something happens to help you at least feel better about things if nothing can be done for now.

Another thing to unload:

My cluttered apartment. Also, facing a bill if I move out, because my deposit won't be enough to clean up the mess I made, possibly wrecking my ability to get a decent place ever again. That's what happened last time I moved out and had to pay an extra $200 on top of it.

I am really incompetent at managing a household.

I've tried getting rid of some of the clutter and organizing my bills (which I've found I've been overpaying on some too much though my auto pay banking online). It is really difficult for me to keep this kind of thing neat and organized.

Now I can't sleep.

I did some massive vacuuming under and around my bed. The results were not pretty, the holder thing full of dust. Tomorrow, I intend to move to the area between my bedroom and bathroom. More stuff I gotta move out of the way to take care of that!

Ah heck I just went and did that area.

There was lots of dust.

It's great that you tackled the dust. I usually feel better after I do that.