regretting my choices

Post Reply New Topic

I'm scared I'm going to lose those close to me because I get very fearful of socializing with them. When I had no friends before I didnt have to worry about people's feelings or whatever because I wasnt close to them and they wasnt close to me I could be on my own and only worry about my own feelings but now things are different and I have friends who like talking to me and I like talking to them but it puts extra stress anxiety and worry on my mind now to match how much they socialize with me and i get scared they gonna think im weird and a ret*d and stop talking to me and not want to have anything to do with me and i dont want that i have grown very close to them and i dont wish to lose them well a part of my heart does tell me i might be happy losing them so i can be alone again and only have to worry about myself but i..........idk if i want that i actually dont want to acknowledge that side of me i mean life isnt about being alone and having no one to talk to you life is about having fun and meeting new people and i want to have fun and meet new people and be happy idk.........my feelings confuse me a lot making conversation and saying the right words without sounding accidentally mean or rude is hard asf and continuing the conversation too i feel like crying just thinking about it

The thing about friendships is this:

People who are *real* friends will put up with your weirdness. If you do something wrong, they will say something politely and give you a chance to amend your ways. If they dump you because you are weird or because you did something inappropriate (as long as it isn't extreme), they aren't *real* friends and aren't worth having.

Only *real* friends are worth having, but they are hard to come by. Unfortunately, it is hard to know if someone is *real* or not when you are first getting to know him/her.

Try not to stress about it. I know that is easier said than done, because I myself stress out over new friendships.

I do know, though, that having a *real* friend is worth all the pain of searching for one. Having someone else in my life to care about is worth the trouble of thinking beyond myself.