I feel like I'm becoming machine like...

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Hey guys.

I've had trouble over the years which has gotten much worse in being able to imagine things and think and solve problems. I used to be fairly good but I have lost much of my ability. I don't feel attached to my memories or much to my family as it's like I'm not real and those things don't really exist. I have felt this way for a very long time and it's meaning that I'm unable to do any meaningful work or live in a meaningful way.

I'm sorry if you don't understand me much. I think one day my mind will disappear almost completely and ill still be functional on the outside but inside I will not be me anymore.

If anyone else is or has been this way did you get better? Does this naturally happen as you get older? Since I was 4 I remember thinking that I didn't want to grow up mentally as I will forget very important things and will change and conform because all adults forget what's important and what our minds should be used for. Did i create this problem myself? Am I sick?

Thanks

Maybe you need to do more intellectually stimulating things to keep up your problem solving abilities and imagination.
I would say doing something with your hands or learning some new topic like online class might wake up your brain.

I think you're right. I'm not really losing my abilities I'm just holding that idea and it became as if it's true. :-/. I've found something that helps now though:) thank you.

you sound as if you need some mental stimulation as suggested. I feel very detached and "mechanical" when I don't get some sort of mental stimuli to break up my day.

i concur with the other suggestions made above, but connecting to your physical body may also help. exercising, yoga, meditation. doesn't hurt to try
i felt understanding when reading your post, especially when it comes to the family stuff. this may just be something you will feel at times, and doing things to recognize it doesn't have to be permanent is helpful. because nothing is permanent. change is the only constant in life.

When we become mentally unwell (depression ) or physically unwell ( ill health, stress, etc. ) we tend to feel mechanical. Doing the same things ( lack of newness) over and again everyday, also makes us mechanical. Sometimes, doing something again for the first time, something that we haven't done since ages helps. For instance, if you haven't watched movies for a long time, you can watch those old fashioned movies of the 50s or 60s or even 90s ! Sometimes, doing simple everyday things like cooking an exotic Spanish/Lebanese dish from the scratch or just painting/drawing with colored crayons (used by kids) will get you out of this mechanical cycle.In relationships,
we feel mechanical when we behave the same way with each other everyday or when we take each other for granted.
We lose pleasure in everyday activities because of this.
There is no perfect solution for all this, just that you have recognized this state of being is more than enough. Stay with this feeling for a few days and see what works for you. But you must take a practical step (like doing something which gives you pleasure) finally. All the best.

Thank you so much guys

I can relate to that so much. In recent years, I've begun remembering times when I promised myself not to change, forget or let my guard down, right after I started to do those things. I'm pleased to know that I didn't forget things like that.
I think children do have knowledge that people lose as they grow older and conform. Maybe not to the degree I was thinking, but still...