The less you have the angrier you get. Please respond!!

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So I'm at a point in my life where I have a lot going on for me compared to the average adult on the spectrum in this day and age. I'm in the last six months of my goal to obtain employment with the federal government. I still have issues that occur due to the fact that I was not diagnosed until later in life. I have no problems physically. My issues are mental health related.


I....................I was in a place where I had to develop these other aspects of my life in order to ensure my survival.......Some of my physiological needs were being met yesterday and today but some are not and it is starting to cause me issues.


I've done a little reading on line about Herbert Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Surprise surprise after all these years of learning how to live with AS the base need for sex as well as intimacy with others is not being met. I've also backslided somewhat occupationally as well. I got demoted at my job but did not lose my rate of pay I have earned over the years I have been there.


This was due to the fact that I need sexual intercourse. Unfortunately I have no social networks to draw from to meet this need. The area in which I live and work does not offer me anyone that I should be involved with romantically. I live out in the suburbs where the average female is either: married, a minor, or too old. I go out to bars around the college campus where I attended and graduated from but again I am not connected to the bar patrons in anyway. Also I don't get out there enough

For the average NT they usually meet someone from their social circle. I don't have that. I have access to books, DVD's and such that teach me how to be a 'more attractive to the opposite sex' and even on the spectrum I have managed to notice results due to what I have had time to read from it.

Over the years I have learned to cope with the AS by adopting behavior patterns that help me blend in. But these are only superficial tactics that help me "get by".Inwardly I feel poor because I am at a plateau and I need to meet my next set of needs. I will..........I just wish more people could accept me and love me even though I have quirks due to the AS. I'm smart enough at this point in my life to know that will never happen. Not only do I have to conform in some ways to get the life I want but I have to go above and beyond the average NT male and self develop until I turn blue in the face...........yay......

How old is too old?

http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/ ... x-not-less
From what I've read, and I tend to read a lot of stuff intended for older adults, older women are looking for more sex.

I believe in positive thinking, and I believe there's a group of friends out there for you with a potential love interest. Get out and do some hobbies. search meetup.com.

Congrats on nearing your goals! I am also a fan of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs; it not infrequently helps me get a handle on things when I am out of sorts. It is one of my favorite tools behind Myers-Briggs.

If you are the studious sort about self-improvement, I might mention the works of Harville Hendricks. His first book which dealt with dating and Imago Theory helped me tremendously.

Yep, that has pretty much been my life story. I had a friend that when asked how he was doing he would sometimes respond: "Oh, I've been in the middle of AFOG", meaning Another F*cking Opportunity for Growth.

Maslow, by and large, gets it right, in my opinion.

I'm glad you're attaining your goals.

I'm in civil service employment myself, and have been for almost 35 years.

I wish I could give a better response but all I can say is that sound very close to my situation. The main thing that gets to me is I have no idea where to start. Like you, I don't have a large social circle, I don't go out to bars, so I really don't know what to do.

Good luck, I hope your situation improves.