My bucket list ?

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Someone asked me if I had a " bucket list " , with my stated what I was told that I stand a chance of being dead in less than a year .
It seems like it was that movie that introced that phrase than everybody started using it .
Maybe a little ~ But what do I have any hope of accomplishing anyway ?
I have NOTHING now ~ I even am relatively flush in cash at hand (by my standards - meaning I have about 4280 in my hidden pocket , of which I guess I'll take $40 out and spend on junk food , and about $130 in the bank , and maybe $70?? in this f*****g ripoff Green Dot ATM card .

...PERHAPS I could manage somehow " seeing my brother/my parents' grave/home area before I die " , if I am to die , if I just , when the weather there's more liveable , made my way to the NYC area , perhaps Social Services would be forgiving then ~ But , especially f I don't die , what do I do then ?

...So this has already been moved , huh ?????????
:et ,e speak of what I did to-day , Wednesday .
There was another Project Homeless Connect (I assume you can confirm this by searching San Francisco) , at the Graham Auditorium , slightly further than the library I spend so much time walking to .
I thought I could maybe get a few (remainder/spare) books or some hot dogs , so I thought , if the line wasn't too long , I'd go to the P H-C .
Well , by the time I got there ~ 3 ?? I set out like 2:25-ish ~ they were closing it down .
Better to know upfront father than once inside ESPECIALLY with my EXAUSTION while WALKING ! !! !! !! !! !!
I decided to go to the bit of park just across , and , with it sunning , give myself some grass & sun ~ I think it was the first time I've TOUUCHED anything green/grass in A WEEK AND A HALF , say .
I went into the library to get (At best) my two back-to-back hours of computer time (Not continuous two hours , after 1 it'll end and , if I get another , I have to connect/start up 100% all over again , I got everything unplugged when the first hour ended .)
If I do do that I think I can't get back to the shelter before they serve the overly salty ~ but free ~ food to me , jail lockup-style in my room , I guess I won't get back by the time they cut that off , so I guess maybe I'll spend $ on Subway .

...I spoke about BL ambitions in an " ambitious " sense , travel and such and I'll leave that alone for now .
Frankly , there's some things I'll probably never own , never have , that I always wanted to have again...Even though I know you're " not supposed to " want to " have things " .
Well , I have had so little for so long ~ and my life has gone so downhill for so long ~ f**k that .
I sort of wanted to have the complete collection of Will Eisner's THE SPIRIT . Maybe some Wally Wood art books too , maybe the complete PEANUTS . Some other/s , perhaps ?
Well , I guess I won't .
I wanted to have a turntable/vinyl-player again .
I guess I never will .
Older people tell me I'll live ~ a younger person is staright-forward that I'll die .
And perhaps I'll just be shelved , i a crappy shelter , till I die ~ Unless at best?? I do a dramatic " live free AND die " break-out , and try to get found on a beach dead somewhere with a comic book .

...And looks like the attempt to " even just symbolically " go to CCSF is going down .

...It's not just that I want the books stuff to HAVE them it's too ENJOY them . Read them/listen to them .
Incidentally , the shelter is frequently trying to push me into going to the hospital ~ I'm not wanted .

...I might get barred from here , so...........

...You know , I might die .