Under a bit of emotions.

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So my mind is going through h--l at this point. I've been thinking so much now that even music isn't therapy at all cause I'm still thinking and there's things I've wanted to do but have no motivation to get to doing it. But that's not t the case fully. I was kicked out from a group that was anime/video game related group on Facebook with out any warnings or notices given to me about the matter, even though I did say I was not trying to go that route with bullying. Here's the part that has me feeling blue and red, I got blocked with out any form of warning and the thing is what has me blue and red, I have a witness and he can say I was never given warning or anything of the matter. This is part on the end that makes me blue. I didn't really even post that board until a couple of days ago, without getting a chance with anything. So my friend tells me one of the admins typically wouldn't care if things did start up and the friend asked the admin who didn't care told him that I was booted because of bullying and saying nothing related to video games or anime.

Here's the thing, I didn't think talking about the Five Night's At Freddy's fandom was anything wrong with talking about it since it was a game. Since I thought it wasn't a problem. Never got a warning or notice for it. So I post in another without drama trying to take place. Since I was going along with everybody else, and the thing was no one was being serious and then there no warning and banned. Then I saw red when a person got framed for something a admin did. I was already blue when I was given no warning.

This made me wish I never went along with it or said anything. Yeah I cried cause I didn't understand why I got banned without warning. So my friend suggests I talk to the admin who could care less. So I told my message to him and what got me was that he was too "lazy to do it atm" and told me to go to another admin. So I did, fuming because of a innocent got framed and a admin for the Facebook admin for the group. So yes I felt like I was a after thought. So I go to the other admin. No response, if she blocks me on Facebook via her personal account, that says to me abuse of power in a group and a my friend said the admin might have a person who hates their own kind black female. So at this point I just want to cry because this made ZERO sense if she did do it without any warning or notice due to a racial case. A couple of people said this sounds race motivated if anything. And the friend is trying to get down to the bottom of this.

I struggle in the real world socially and I feel like I'm nothing and a afterthought Aspie, so for me it's easier to type than talk at times unless I've known for years, but I do feel like I should've been given a chance...I swear I think Facebook groups are a way getting back at Aspie's and multiple disorders for NT's to prey on. I'm starting to think I should drink to numb it because there's but I don't want to be told "no1curr" or get told on here "tl:dr" (too long; didn't read.) Cause at this point. I feel like I'm worthless despite family and family telling me otherwise. Maybe I should stop her because I am frustrated and just want to seriously stay off any social media at this point. I would post that but I'll getting screen shots on to google drive.