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Just messed it all up again

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Jo_B1_Kenobi
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26 Apr 2016, 6:46 am

I was supposed to be having lunch with a friend today. I don't know her very well but we get on well and I enjoy her company. We have a common interest too which really helps. I was supposed to pick her up at her place (she doesn't have a car) at 12.00. So I got there at 11:59 and knocked on the door and the windows were open but no-one answered. So I waited for 5 minutes and stroked their cat, but because of a pain condition I couldn't stand there for longer I was already in pain from the 5 minutes. So I went home. Now I don't know what to do. I've got this feeling that I've messed it up but I'm too upset to phone.

Also, this friend has a disabled husband who is really quite unwell at the moment so I didn't want to knock twice because if she wasn't in and I got him out of bed that would be really mean to him. Also, he doesn't seem to like it if I phone. I don't have her mobile number. It almost never works out when we make an arrangement to meet up and I can't work out what I'm doing wrong. I feel awful. I'm am so rubbish at this stuff. I could really do with a friend too.


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syzygyish
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26 Apr 2016, 7:58 am

Jo_B1_Kenobi wrote:
I was supposed to be having lunch with a friend today. I don't know her very well but we get on well and I enjoy her company. We have a common interest too which really helps. I was supposed to pick her up at her place (she doesn't have a car) at 12.00. So I got there at 11:59 and knocked on the door and the windows were open but no-one answered. So I waited for 5 minutes and stroked their cat, but because of a pain condition I couldn't stand there for longer I was already in pain from the 5 minutes. So I went home. Now I don't know what to do. I've got this feeling that I've messed it up but I'm too upset to phone.

Also, this friend has a disabled husband who is really quite unwell at the moment so I didn't want to knock twice because if she wasn't in and I got him out of bed that would be really mean to him. Also, he doesn't seem to like it if I phone. I don't have her mobile number. It almost never works out when we make an arrangement to meet up and I can't work out what I'm doing wrong. I feel awful. I'm am so rubbish at this stuff. I could really do with a friend too.


You are panicking so completely un-nessarsarily !

You know you could have been a founding member of WP?


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Jo_B1_Kenobi
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26 Apr 2016, 11:25 am

syzygyish wrote:

You are panicking so completely un-nessarsarily !

You know you could have been a founding member of WP?


That's part of what's wrong I think. I never know when it's necessary and when it's not. As soon as I get into uncharted space socially I can't manage. As soon as I don't know what I should do, don't know the rules, I panic.

I really dislike never knowing if I've done something wrong. It is so stressful.

Thanks for your reply - that was really helpful.



PS: I'm not a founding member, I'm still only a snowy owl. :-)


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kraftiekortie
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26 Apr 2016, 5:53 pm

Don't panic.

Maybe you should have called the person telling the person you've arrived at the location of your meeting.

Give her a call later. Tell the person you couldn't wait because you have a pain condition, and that you hope you folks will get together soon.

Arrange it so that you call the person when you arrive, then stay in your car until the person arrives.



syzygyish
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27 Apr 2016, 6:28 am

Jo_B1_Kenobi wrote:
syzygyish wrote:

You are panicking so completely un-nessarsarily !

You know you could have been a founding member of WP?


That's part of what's wrong I think. I never know when it's necessary and when it's not. As soon as I get into uncharted space socially I can't manage. As soon as I don't know what I should do, don't know the rules, I panic.

I really dislike never knowing if I've done something wrong. It is so stressful.

Thanks for your reply - that was really helpful.


PS: I'm not a founding member, I'm still only a snowy owl. :-)


syzygyish wrote:
You know you could have been a founding member of WP?


That was a bit of an in-joke
Since WP was conceptualised we've had this constant flow of ASD people flood the gates!
:lol:

Another joke
If Donald Trump gets elected we'll build a wall!
:wink:


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Jo_B1_Kenobi
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27 Apr 2016, 12:17 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Don't panic.

Maybe you should have called the person telling the person you've arrived at the location of your meeting.

Give her a call later. Tell the person you couldn't wait because you have a pain condition, and that you hope you folks will get together soon.

Arrange it so that you call the person when you arrive, then stay in your car until the person arrives.


Thanks, this is really helpful advice. Much appreciated. :-)


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Jo_B1_Kenobi
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27 Apr 2016, 12:19 pm

syzygyish wrote:
Jo_B1_Kenobi wrote:


PS: I'm not a founding member, I'm still only a snowy owl. :-)



That was a bit of an in-joke
Since WP was conceptualised we've had this constant flow of ASD people flood the gates!
:lol:

Another joke
If Donald Trump gets elected we'll build a wall!
:wink:



LOL - Thanks! :D


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Diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ICD10)