I've been thinking...

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I've been thinking of leaving WrongPlanet.

After 8 years and nearly 30,000 posts, it may be time to hang it up. My reasons? In no particular order ...

... Everything that could be said on any given subject has been said and re-said many times over.

... I'll never be a moderator.

... Page after page of "Magic" spam.

... People keep asking the same old questions (Part I): "Am I autistic?", "Is my <friend/relative/spouse> autistic?", "Is <name of famous person> autistic?", "Is <name of fictional character> autistic?", et cetera, ad nauseum.

... People keep asking the same old questions (Part II): "What did <he/she> mean?", "Why can't I get a <girl/guy>?", "Why are <men/women> so nasty to me?", "What do <men/women> really want?"?", et cetera, ad nauseum.

... People keep asking the same old questions (Part III): "Can't we get rid of 'Captcha'?", "Why can't I declare my sex as something other than female or male?", "Why was my <post/thread/account> deleted?", "Why is free speech restricted on this website?", "What are 'The Rules', and why should I obey them anyway?", et cetera, ad nauseum.

... People keep asking the same old questions (Part IV): "Can't we start our own exclusive country?", "Why are Neurotypicals so <deceitful/ignorant/insensitive/rude/stupid>?", "Is <________> a cure for Autism?", "Does <________> cause Autism?", "Is there a link between <________> and Autism?", et cetera, ad nauseum.

... The 'Counting' games.

... The most interesting members have stopped posting years ago.

So maybe it's time for me to leave. With less than 200 posts to go until I reach 30,000, and my interest in this website waning, maybe I should start composing my "Farewell Post" now and submit it when I reach that "Magic" number.

[Que the empty flattery and insincere testimonials. ]

Last edited by Fnord on 12 Jul 2016, 9:03 am, edited 1 time in total.

I understand your frustration about things you mentioned, but I'm sorry you feel you have to leave WP. You must do what you feel is right, though.

You and your wicked sense of humor will be missed.

I feel sad; you don't find me interesting

The Captcha, of course, can be aggravating.

And, of course, the Spam.

As to those other questions: Yes....it can become monotonous and mundane--but people, usually, do not know as much about autism as people who are regulars on this Site. They might have just found out about it. They are seeking answers from people who have actually experienced it, to supplement their Internet research. I feel anecdote is a fine supplement to research; it's much better than just one or the other.

There will never come a time when "everything that could be said on any given subject has been said, etc." We still haven't gone beyond the Earth-Moon system (only probes to planets). There are 7 billion opinions in this naked world as well. The world is in quite a flux now. New words are being invented every day. New wars are being fought. Unfortunately, people are being sacrificed to this flux, which is interesting to those who are detached from it.

I can sense your weariness. I get weary like you get weary.

Whatever you want to do: good luck!

I think Fnord that your mental filter for repetitive questions is defective. I recognize that there are a lot of topics posted that are old hat, but I just skim past those, and stick to people I find interesting. (Like you.)

I feel I have received a great deal of support here and I also attempt to offer support. For me, that emotional give and take is the appeal of Wrongplanet, not the intellectual content of particular threads. Now, you may not be a person who is comfortable baring your soul and allowing others (strangers, at least) to care about you, so you may differ quite a lot from me in this regard.

Swan songs in internet communities are dumb. If you want to leave, just leave. If it's taking too much of your time, only drop in once a month. But the time may come when you will want support, or just connection, and you may find to your dismay that others have moved on.

That's completely understandable actually, 8 years is a long time, especially for anything on the 'net. To be honest there's probably only a handful of people here that have been here as long as yourself-- most of the "class of '08" has long since moved on. Also, with what you've gone through in the last year or so I've got to think there's more gratifying things you could spend your time with than pseudo-strangers on an internet forum. There are plenty of us here throwing out unpleasant cold hard logic that your "faction" and thus yourself will be represented here in some fashion long after you decide to leave. (Yes, "faction" is probably not the appropriate term for "independent thinkers" but they do tend to group in the same threads/arguments-- and I'm pretty sure outside the technical limitations of language you understand what I'm saying).

As for the moderator quip, two things: 1. look at your arguments before the quip and after, and then consider yourself lucky that you never had to play that role and 2. could you have really have been yourself while also wearing a moderator's cap? Probably not, and to be honest, you've probably got more satisfaction exercising that freedom than you ever would have gotten exercising the power. It's one of those things that looks good on paper, but that's only because you didn't think to read the fine print (yes, even us "learned" INTJ types aren't immune to wishful thinking, and we're especially susceptible to overlooking the obvious). Most people want the moderator's role not for power, but for recognition and respect, realize that you don't need the moderator's role for that-- you've earned the equivalent through pure hard work (posting near 30,000 times), and if you want evidence of that go to a thread where something is upsetting you from a "rule" standpoint, point it out and watch as a group rallies around you to stop the behavior.

On a side note, if you really want to freak people out make your last post in a game thread, lol. If you do decide to make your exit I wish you the best of luck and it's been fun arguing with you the last two years.

Much like hospitals and social work, the unfortunate nature of any 'helpful' website is that there will always be people needing help. Sometimes you make a difference and get that glorious feeling of a job well done, but there is precious little in the way of 'progress', and compassion fatigue is a very real thing.

But your contribution has been appreciated! I wish you the best.

I hear you loud and clear Fnord (am I agreeing with you AGAIN???). I made a comeback myself a couple of years ago after retiring and think it's time for me to hang it up for good for much for the same reasons: I've already been greatly reducing my posts and may soon give it up for good. I would also add that my frustration is that of all the experience and knowledge I have gained (particular in love and relationships), few seem to want to take my advice or heed my warnings of what's about to happen to them. I'm not some ivory tower intellectual: I went from complete and utter failure in relationships to a relationship with a psychotic stalker (who still cyberstalks me) to a success and know what it's like to be "in the gutter" but it seems like my posts are ignored (or I get a hostile reaction) rather than respected. I want to repay the kindness I got in my early years but it seems like nobody is interested sad to say and for whatever strange reason, these posters WANT to experience misery and failure.

I've strongly disagreed with you on too many occasions to count but I always had respect for your differing views. You certainly provided a unique perspective on things to say the least.

I disagree. On another forum I posted on, some members just stopped posting. I always was left to wonder if they died suddenly or what: when people left it was always nice to say goodbye. At least if I stop posting the WP community will know why: I wasn't offended, I didn't pass away I have just decided to move on to other things.

@Aristophanes: I've learned a lot about being a moderator from the moderators here. I think I could do the job; and frankly, I've grown so jaded over the interactions between members, that performing moderatorial duties might actually be a relief!

@Incendax: Whether it's "burnout" or just being "jaded", the results are the same. How many times can you reply with "Evidence, Please?" in PP&R before you finally realize the futility of bringing the Light of Truth and Reason to conversations full of half-formed ideas and outlandish claims?

@GHF: I would rather have earned the grudging respect of an opponent than the fawning admiration of an ally. Thank you for that respect.

Fnord, I am the same age as you. I was only diagnosed as ASD a few months ago. I started to suspect it just over a year ago and went through some interesting times finding someone to diagnose an "old" woman. Something in your signature block took a weight off my shoulders. A real "yes, that's it" moment. It was: "Let's get this straight: (1) Vague hints do not work; (2) Subtle hints do not work;
(3) Strong hints do not work; and (4) Obvious hints do not work.
So, if you have something to say to me, then just say it;
because this is exactly what I am doing, and I expect others to do the same!" I knew I had found "my" people.

Fnord, I totally agree with you on this. I really need to revamp my browser bookmarks again, when I do I will NOT re-add WP. I posted about leaving in Members Only, and up popped Alex with happy talk about everything being fine, then he flew off to his life. It's clear to me that Alex pays the server fees for WP, and that's about it. He didn't introduce the new site until all the previous mods quit at once, and then it was full of bugs, and still is. The Baba Ji spam still continues, and Alex doesn't seem to care about stopping it. All the people who used to be admins left long ago, and Alex hasn't gotten any new ones. The maturity level of the forum seems to have declined as a lot of posters now are teens or young adults, and prefer ranting about youth drama as if this was Instagram instead of helping each other. So, I think it's time to leave, probably within the next few days.

What are you hoping for from this thread?

Yes the topics can be repetitive, maybe that works for people at certain points in their lives, perhaps that is why the counting/off the wall section is popular.

Ugh.

I'll miss you.

As for being a moderator, it's a thankless task as evidenced by the high turn-over rate. People with unreasonable expectation wanting you to be a paragon of objectivity while one side is whining you're too lenient, while the other side is blubbering you're too harsh. And god forbid you actually have your own opinions on things.

Believe me, I've had similar thoughts of leaving.

you dont have to leave completely, you could just read and post less

i mostly browse wp while eating lunch or dinner and post occasionally

As with you, Fnord, I've been somewhat dismayed on how shallow this place has become, especially with a certain member with a feline avatar, causing all the grief around here. I've pm'ed mods to yank my account, (of which they still have yet to do) because of all the vitriol. It's one thing to have violent disagreements, it's quite another to have users tear people new a**holes for having differing opinions. I may not have agreed with everything you said, but, at least we can agree to disagree, without tearing out each other's throats. If you go, that'll be one less light of intelligence that will appear on this board.

If you decide to leave, good luck, and thanks for all the fish!

If I remember correctly Fnord has something against these kind of treads where people tell they are leaving. And now he makes one himself.