diagnosis, now what?

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Hello,
I got diagnosed on the 22nd June as Autistic. Now what? The guy that diagnosed me said that a woman would be in touch but I haven't yet heard anything from her. I emailed the guy, a nice man named Howard with no response. I am worried they may have forgotten about me.
I am thinking about returning to work as being out of work is no good for me. I am spending what is left of my little savings and my brain is turning to jelly in the process. I am trying to keep busy but I find it very difficult to do thinks spontaneously. Though following through with a plan has been an issue as well. The thought of going to work through an agency is scaring me. I have a really hard time at work, I have had people shout abuse at me and threaten to hit me. I have been hit at work. I don't provoke people, I don't want to put across this idea that I am obnoxious. I tend to keep to myself and I think there are people that prey on that. They do things, little things at first and because I don't fight back they get worse. To the point of shouting abuse and threats of violence.
I would like to go to work, but with some of my physical problems as well I think it could be hard. The alternative is scaring the crap out of me as well, suicide. I have been planning it on and off for years. Always putting it off, 1. because it is scary and 2. because I don't want to hurt my parents.
I have to go now, I would like to add more. Maybe later. Thanks
Simon

You should consider adding your country, so that those who live in your region can suggest resources specific to where you live. I don't have any specific advice to employment unfortunately as I am on permanent disability myself, but I understand and empathize with the stress you are going through that can certainly evoke suicidal thoughts.

To answer your title question "Diagnosis, Now What":

next comes an adjustment phase and a learning curve. You have come to the best place! Welcome to WP. Here is a thread that details some of the books members most favour here:

viewtopic.php?t=320146&p=7183771

Tony Attwood is the one that I tend to favour most, and he has a lot of videos (short talks on different aspects of Asperger's Syndrome on Youtube, maybe you would like to start there.

Things may feel very different for you in six month's time, and often people go through a grieving process soon after diagnosis because losses are suddenly recognised. However the upside is that for many people, diagnosis means an end to the self-punishment of continuous self-blaming. The past looks different after diagnosis, you look back and realise you did the best you knew how to then. Don't beat yourself up over it.

I totally agree with B19.

With a diagnosis in hand, it may be possible to figure out why you had so much trouble in the past and actually learn from your mistakes.

Many Aspies suffer from black/white thinking. They make a totally logical conclusion and suffer because they stick by their principles to the bitter end. If your co-workers think you are wrong you should just let it go.

Aspies need to find suitable work environments--a government job at the Department of Motor Vehicles might actually work for an Aspie because the pace of work is what it is--unlike a fast food joint where you get fired for working too slow.

Every Aspie is different, that DMV job might not work because it involves doing the same stuff every day--but that might be perfect for someone who loves fixed routines and doesn't mind doing the very same thing for years and years.

Hello,
Thanks for the response. I am from Portsmouth in Hampshire, UK. I don't know what sort of help is available in this area. I did try to contact the doctor that diagnosed me and am waiting for a phone call/email from him, or from the woman he mentioned. I am starting to think that they have forgotten me.
I do want to go back to work but the thought of an it makes me sick with anxiety.
Currently, I wake up late and pretty much do nothing all day long. I am trying to study for an HND in Electronics. The cost of the course is kind of putting me off. I have to learn math over again. I am having a hard time with trigonometry and algebra at the moment. I try to do something, clearing my room is a nightmare and studying is slow, really slow.
I would like to try the list thing but find it difficult due the "starting things" anxiety that I get.
I hope everyone is well and doing OK.
All the best
Simon

A lack of acceptance causes us to freeze. I was so stunned by my diagnosis that I had to go home, take 3 online tests (which produced the same results) and then make another appointment with the psychiatrist. She suggested a more comprehensive exam - I did that - the results were the same - Asperger's or HFA at a very high level. The step after acceptance is developing coping mechanisms. My coping mechanisms are rooted in understanding myself and others, compassion and kindness. Hurtful behaviors, anger and frustration lead to depression and other problems that compound on top of our difficulties. All of those views are available to us. We must choose which ones we will focus on and grow in the garden of our minds.