vincent_ellicott wrote:
Meistersinger wrote:
Aristophanes wrote:
Well my point Meistersinger (for some reason I think R. Wagner when I see your name btw), is that if you're gone well that's one less curmudgeon on earth and old school curmudgeons are an endangered species as is. So you can't commit suicide because you have obligations to your people.
The only obligation I have to my creditors (mostly medical). I have been told by my relatives and most of my so-called friends that I could drop dead, and they would dance with glee on my carcass and my grave. It looks like I'm going to get the same treatment here. I'll keep my mouth from now on, if this is the kind of so-called support I can expect from this group.
Please excuse the new guy butting in. It is disgusting what your friends and family have told you. Forgive me if this is an inappropriate question, but did your relatives literally say those kinds of words to you?
With the exception of my youngest brother, who has a son and and a daughter who are low functioning and non-verbal, yes. They even as much as offered to give me the tools to do the deed in their presence. Even my youngest brother and his wife even consider me to be a no-good lazy-assed motherf!cker, and they are the ones who suspected that I was on the spectrum 4 years ago, when I was awarded SSDI. Their opinion is like the rest of the Amish and Mennonites here in South Central PA: work until you literally drop dead, then get back up and start working again until you literally drop dead! Lather, rinse, repeat ad nauseum. They are of the opinion that SSDI is for the physically disabled. There is no such thing as mental illness. Mental illness is nothing more than being a lazy no good sonofab!tch, and the should be executed without recourse. Ditto for those on welfare and living in Section 8 housing. Can you say Trump, as well as Cruz Supporters? Sure, I knew you could.
Bad thing is, where were they when my late mother needed help? I can understand why my youngest brother and his wife didn't help out much, with a son and a daughter on the spectrum who don't sleep, a stepson that's OCD when he contracts streph throat, and my brother working rotating shifts each week for the past 20 years. Number 2 brother would only show up to help when he and his second wife (who I can't stand, and is extremely passive-aggressive) wanted something to crow about to their home church (They're United Methodists). The next to the youngest always thought everybody owed him a living, especially after he came back from cleaning up the mess from Desert Storm. He even as much as accused me of causing mom's death after I lost my job at Papa John's. (I was fired from there because of a Moving violation. Papa John's, even to this day, has a zero tolerance policy when it comes to drivers getting traffic tickets.). He's the one who threw me out of what is now HIS house (which he bought from mom's estate) for not wanting to do manual labor (If you were an employer of such a firm, and you saw I had a Master's in Library and Information science, and found out I'm a klutz, and a perfectionist, and an insulin-dependent and insulin-resistant diabetic, would you hire me as an employee? I highly doubt it. Besides, I've been that route and have the battle scars and rejection letters to prove it. Being over 55 didn't help.)
Lately, this black guy I've been chauffeuring everywhere he needs to go because he's a drunk, an alcoholic, and has a DWI on his record, has been really getting under my skin. If you think those of us that are high-functioning are hardheaded and concrete thinkers, you ought to hang with that brother from the 'hood. Lately, he's been triggering the 3 to 5 panic attacks I have every night, as well as the meltdowns when I get home. No amount of chamomile tea, or the relaxation apps I have on my iPhone and iPad are helping. He's going to force me back on to psychotropic drugs whether I like it or not. Then he'll b***h because I'm back on those meds, and gaslight me even further. If I don't answer my phone, I'll have 20-30 messages in my voicemail, cursing me out for not answering my phone. If I don't do something exactly the way he wants it done, where he wants it done, what time he wants it done, and who to do it to, here comes the verbal and mental abuse. I've told him several times to f!ck off, and he never takes the hint, even if I make it extremely crude and clear I no longer want to even be associated with him.
Add to the fact I suffer PTSD, as well Seasonal Affective Disorder (which is starting again since Dad's been dead now for 30 years as of next month, Mom would have been 79 next month, Dad would have been 81 in September, my sister would have been 51 in September (she died 49 years ago), I turn 59 in September, and Mom's been dead 5 years come November. And people wonder why I titled this thread the way it stands?
23 Jul 2016, 7:44 pm
