is this what my future holds?

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So I'm two days post-op with these 4 incisions from my gall bladder surgery, and I've been having back spasms all day and generally twice as disabled as usual. I realize my toilet needs plunging, nothing gross, just a little too much toilet paper. Since I can barely stand, and I keep spasming, I asked my husband to plunge it for me, while I was taking a shower.

Before I know it he's overflowed the toilet all over the bathroom floor. I'm feeling crummy and toilet issues are one of my big autistic stressors, and it's all I can do not to call him an idiot. Then he's got the wet-dry vac in there and when he's done with that, leaves it on my bedroom floor along with a huge hank of extension cord. So I'm trying to back out on my scooter, and the extension cord very nearly dumps me on the floor, which would be kind of a big no-no for someone with fresh incisions. Again - it's all I can do to be marginally nice to him.

He's trying to help me and do the right thing, but he has some kind of progressive neurological disease that causes poor judgement and distractibility and ok, he's losing his marbles. We did health care power of attorneys last week and he checked that his health care agent (me) does NOT have his permission to check him into a rest home for other than short-term rehabilitative stays. So you want to be discharged from the hospital to home, says I? Yes he says. The lawyer looked at me and I just shrugged. There is no way I can take care of a bedridden man, neither make the bed, nor turn him, nor help him with transfers.

I am pretty sure things will look better in the morning, but right now things just look icky. I've asked him to finish up in the bedroom and go sleep in the living room. I just have this complete feeling of revulsion from all the sick and dying and helpless stuff.

This sounds like you are both truly doing your very best, and neither are at fault. Please keep calling people. Attorney, doctor, physical therapy, family, anyone. Keep ringing those phones until someone is over there helping you two. I'm so sorry all of this is happening to you.

Thank you, John. I will cope. I always do. It's just that last night I was overwhelmed with helplessness. I'm feeling a bit better today, and tomorrow should be better yet.

My husband's best friend is in hospice, we visited today. It was just one more memento mori.

You're very welcome.

I'm sorry to get supernatural here, but I believe we were all attacked last night. It came for me too.
And then I had a huge dream. It was the one where the whole city is rearranged, and your house is a totally different building, even though you seem to recognize it.
I drove up the driveway, laying on the gas to make it up the hill, even though I've never lived in such a driveway. But it was so familiar. I found the door open, and was worried. But I went in, and someone else's belongings were there. I was glad, because I felt someone else had moved in, and I was just checking on the place to make sure it was okay. That the new resident wouldn't be tormented by this thing.

I'm not pinning this onto any particular religion or theology. But I think you know.

No, I don't know what you were referring to, sorry.

Things will resolve themselves.

I would tell your husband to please be careful next time, and to not leave the extension cord on the floor in the bathroom. You might trip---and there's a very slight chance you might be electrocuted, too.

I sometimes do stupid things like that...and my wife has to remind me sometimes. She doesn't always do it gracefully.

I hope you feel better soon. Surgery sucks. Recovery sucks.

But at least you've got your mind still.

Thanks, kraftiekortie.

If it makes you feel any better, my husband does not have any disease and would still do the things yours did.

My husband and son (on spectrum) are both kind of clumsy and tend to make any mess they're attempting to clean larger. The other day hubby moved a piece of furniture and broke our thermostat right off the wall.