No Good Deed..

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....Goes Unpunished.

Okay so I've worked a fairly long shift in the kitchen today after already dealing with a lot of other personal issues those who know me more personally are aware of. It's gone 10. I'm very tired. I have a friend trying to get me to help him take stuff from his house to where his ex is staying. In spite of having to go further out of my way after 2 bus journeys home and carry things I thought "screw it". He's a good friend and he's younger than me. I know what it's like to have no one at tough times and, I can take it. It was an odd hour to be pleading for some assistance but hey, I obliged.

So I walked to his place and he is asking me to take some stuff with him to where his ex is staying. Turns out that's at another friend of mine's place above a pub. Apparently my friend living there said this was OK for us to do, but it had to be after the bar was shut. Sure enough it was just coming up to 11:30. The pub had been shut some time so OK. But no....in the parking lot was the other friend's relative/landlord. Apparently this was not OK because she did not give this person permission to live there.

While this was not my ex GF, the relative was mostly arguing with me and not my friend... She would not listen to any reason and just kept repeating herself and held us responsible for this guy's ex, who our other friend told us was OK staying with him. It's not like my friend kicked her out on the street. She just decided she didn't want to live with her mom even though there's no problems at home, invited herself to live at my friends and lived off his parents and his money, and refused to look for somewhere else to live when his parents asked her to.

I got barred from the pub for taking the girls' clothes for her to where she was staying. The aunt said she didn't want to put a girl on the street, but at the same time complained about her being there and said she is kicking her out tomorrow. She also moaned about our apparent lack of consideration, yet was annoyed that we were taking this girls stuff that she needed for the next day to her. I don't get it, it just seems like highly irrational and illogical arguments being made for the sake of it. I mean, she barred me from the pub but took the clothes up to the girl anyway!! And I got more s**t than the guy who got me to drag the damn stuff up there! I really don't get it.

I dunno. I'm very tired, I'm like 3 hours late from when I should've been home and I just needed to vent this because it's so damn weird, and annoying. What sense can you make from all this? As a spectator..it's strange.

Your friend put you into a situation. He was very inconsiderate for doing that. It wasn't cool at all.

This sort of thing, like you said, would make me reluctant to help people.

He was a bit pushy, and I did explain why this person's relative might have been irked by the whole thing.
While my friend apologised I don't really hold him responsible. He's been put in a situation and it's not one someone his age in more fortunate circumstances should have to deal with.

She (the landlady) now has an illegal tenant which her nephew lied about, but at the same time she has to look like she's an upstanding individual by putting on a charade of empathy. That much was very clear when she attempted to argue poorly with us and relied solely on her leverage as the premises supervisor. It was all unfortunately timed if you ask me. Had we turned up just 5 or 10 minutes later no one would have been there, the stuff would've got dropped off and this wouldn't have happened. Sadly it did. It's the worst case scenario for my friend and I advised him that this is the worst thing that could've happened so he's dealt with the worst and it'll get better.

I hope this serves as a reminder to both him and my other friend who they decide to let into their lives when it comes to dating. And if all the landlady could do was bar me for ironically trying to help the girl she claimed I wasn't helping, I don't particularly envy the people who are allowed in for a drink. I had only a vague understanding of the situation, and this guy is naive and trying to do the right thing. He had no say in whether this girl got to stay in his parents house (not his house, somehow this concept was too hard for the landlady to understand) and was just trying to get the stuff to his ex at a place where our other friend had said it was ok for her to stay.

I just don't like getting involved in these sorts of situations. I don't tend to handle them too well.

You're pretty good at this sort of thing.

I dunno why I decided to go out of my way last thing at night.
Would've been easier to flake. I just figured this guy needed a break after hearing part of the story a couple of days ago and in spite of all the bad things happening to me already I wanted to do something good for someone.

There just gets a point where you deal with these sorts of situations enough and they just don't matter.

I probably won't offer to help again soon, though.

Thanks for listening thus far.
Just crazy how it only takes 1 person to mess everyone up.

I think you did a nice thing for somebody. I hope the guy appreciates the effort.

And I hope, if a person really needs your help, that you'll offer the help. But get some background first.

Otherwise, you won't know what you're getting into.

I should know....I've been in sort of similar situations in the past. It's how people learn, really.

That's why I always say that one has to go out in the world in order to learn about the world.

I won't lie I am often very cautious and paranoid about such favours.
My gut is usually correct.

I'll still help people from time to time I'll try to be more careful though and weigh things up.

I thought what you did was very kind. It’s a shame you don’t want to help someone out in future because of people like this, though I guess I understand it.

Honestly seems like they kind of took advantage, so yeah I'd be wary of helping these people out anymore to.