We Love Esmeralda Weatherwax

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My mum's still after me to take another university course. I'm so tired I almost feel like giving in.

Why don't you want to go to University?

Do you feel anxious in a university setting?

Obviously, you should go in for creative writing.

I was at university residence for three and a half months. It was absolute hell. I nearly went mad.
The classes were dead boring, including when I completed [against my better judgement] the year with online courses. I didn't learn a thing I don't already know.

University has changed since when my mum went, and she can't seem to understand that I have no interest in university.

The trouble with creative writing classes is that there's always a rigid way of thinking that is predominant in near every school in the world: that things can only be done one way.

We love Esme. I hope you get better soon.

What happened to Esme?

Apparently she's not feeling so good, at all. Here's lots of virtual hugs for her from me and Boo.

And from me, too!

mee three!

I really hope she gets well soon. She was the one person who really helped me feel better when I was very depressed & distraught about something last year. She's a great source of emotional support for others here.

she IS a good egg

Oh jeez guys. I don't know what to say. Flattered by the kind words, sorry they seemed necessary in the circumstances. Hugs to all of you - nice, sanitized hugs that won't make you catch what I have.

Here's the news: I am very very sick, and it's taken months and visits to multiple different doctors to even begin to get a handle on the problem. It started with an infected spider bite and a steroid shot (which, at the time, was perfectly appropriate), but it's more complicated than that. I've been out of commission since late July, effectively. Been misdiagnosed, been fighting my way through a medical labyrinth, been absolutely wretched.

Just this past week I finally found an internist with relevant experience who has seen other cases of what I seem to have. Now it's a matter of trying treatments til we find the right one, because apparently responses vary, and there aren't yet any confirmative tests that are worth the cost. And the meds are weird (unusual).

Anyway, I've lost tons of weight (and wasn't all that big to begin with) and have been averaging about two to four hours of sleep a night (so my blood pressure's been in the stratosphere. Thank God this doc believed me about the lack of sleep being the most likely cause; it's already down 40 points, because I'm sleeping better this week - what he's given me seems to be working.)

I won't be around much for a while. I've been told that this is 100% curable but it will take a few weeks of the right tx to do the trick, and after two months of 2 - 4 hours sleep per night, all I want to do is snooze in between taking the meds. Which knock me out too.

Keep me in your thoughts, and pray that Firefox and Windows don't update me off the site again anytime soon, so I can get back here once I'm on my feet.



No, that's not me, and I haven't gotten to the point of hospital. But I came much too close for comfort. Wish me luck.

Healing thoughts and warm hugs Esme

i'm glad you have good health insurance

VERY happy to hear things will improve for you! Sounds like you've really been through hell.