Losing friends

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So i had a friend. We even shared an apartment at one point and got on really well. I was suffering from really bad depression last year and that's when she dropped me for good. I moved to a new home. It was 5 minutes down the road from her house. I was really unhappy and lonely. I'd had my heart broken and was feeling like a piece of trash. I tried to tell her how I wasn't coping, but she just didn't care.

All I needed was a friend. All I wanted was to be invited out and included in things.

Anyway, as we know I've moved and I'm getting on better in life, so I've tried to reconnect with her. I invited her over and she says she's too busy. Noticed on instagram she's out with her NT popular friends.

So... I am dropped as a friend for good.

It really hurts. I know I'm better off not having someone who doesn't care about me in my life. But we were really close at one point. I was the friend that stayed when all of her friends she'd had as a teenager dropped her. I thoughy we'd be friends for life. It's weird how things can change so drastically.

I just wanted a rant. People suck.

Ive lost all my friends
They all “grew up “ as they and others say and I didn’t. I don’t think as a disabled person I can ever have friends.

Yes people do suck

You frequently hear the advice in dealing with depression, "Stay away from negative people."

Well, which people are negative? The depressed ones! A persistent pessimistic mindset is typical of people in depressed states.

Therefore depressed people are likely to lose friends when in a depressive episode, and unlikely to make any new friends in that state as well. The paradox here is that as much as you need friends if you are depression prone, you are not really a good person for friends to hang out with.

It's a good reason to strive for mental health - so that you can have the social support (friendship) that will make you mentally healthy.

I totally empathise with you! It so difficult having short term friends becoming long term friends. NTs are completely insensitive and lacking common sense understanding their surroundings. NTs are deemed to be social creatures, hence they can also do nasty, incompetent, brainwashing and selfish things. That is called 'human games'. In dating world they make games with numbers.

Aspies are straight-minded and blunt people due to their interpersonal skills that being honest, factual and organised. NTs find that it is boring, predictive and repetitive. Big Bang Theory shows that good example. NTs have poor skills in lacking adaptability, manage to deal with change and empathy.

I very much deal same thing as you, and many other aspies. It so hard to make friends even when you are passionate, honest and caring person. NTs make friends easy when they nor worried about social privileges because they are instant.

I rarely come across a depressive NT lose friends. Let alone a disabled person quickly judged.

Yes people freaking suck...at my apartment i had to complain to management about kids hanging out right up against my back door. Stupid teen that lives in that apartment keeps trying to bother me...like trying to turn her music up for a second in the yard like she wants me to come out and say something....I have just been ignoring it. I just never met people before that think if you rented a bottom apartment you are entitled to be subject to constant kids screaming and yelling and playing right outside the sliding glass door of your apartment. Stupid teen even said...'well maybe you guys shouldn't have got a bottom apartment'. excuse me, my boyfriend works and we pay f*****g rent we deserve a little privacy in our living room which those stupid kids cannot respect. Point is people do suck.

Not to mention I think the teenager said some 'scary' stuff about me to her younger sibling...Like today I was going into my apartment and the kid gave me a scared look and went away. Like all I complained about was people hanging out right in front of my door...and now everytime these people see me they run away like they were doing something wrong or whatever. All I wanted was to stop playing right outside my door...but not sure what that teenager told them about me all I know is the kid gave me a scared look and ran inside. It bothers me because I was not trying to scare any kids....just wanted them to quit hanging out and loudly playing right next to my back door. But now for all I know the neighbor teen has told them I am some kind of terrible racist or something. To be clear I could care less what color the children are I just don't want people right outside my sliding glass door...I don't get why that is so hard.

Yes. This is so true.

It's difficult to make it up to people when you're out the other end of the depressive episode too. They don't trust you anymore. I guess they're trying to avoid negativity too. All I really needed was friends though. I was so lonely.

I feel a bit better today. I made an effort to invite some new friends over and just accept that I need to move forward in my life.

Being around new people who have no pre-conception of how I used to be has helped. No judgement. No walking on eggshells around me. No expectation that I'll just be miserable and no fun.

Also I met a couple of older folks who just sat and listened to me. They didn't really know me, but have been through stuff themselves and it was just such a relief to be listened to for once. That really helped me to start healing.

I lose friends cause I can’t afford to do the activities they do.