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Today when I was talking to my mom she said the guy tht used to abuse me called and said he wanted to talk to me. He never hurt me too bad. Just pushed me into the stairs and I got bruises on my butt. He also pushed me into the walls and slapped the glasses off my face. Almost broke them. So I stupidly called him wondering what he wanted. He just wanted to chat about nothing in particular. But he asked how to get into my place.

I thought about it and think its wize I dont hang out with him. He was very mean when we used to hang out. I got put down a lot. The police got involved a year ago when he pushed me into the stairs. I think I should call them and tell them to tell him to just leave me alone. I dont want him to go to jail or anything because he did have charges for abuse against him, but I asked to drop the charges because I didnt want the burden of going to court. So hopefully they dont try to arrest him or something. I dont want to tell him to leave me alone myself because I dont want to talk to him. He makes me uncomfortable.

What do you guys think I should do?

If you think he is coming over, it is probably good to have someone there with you when he appears. Do not let him into your house and make it emphatically clear that you do not want to see him.

@SarahSmith: Were I in your place, I would never entertain the idea of seeing this man again. Just as haters gotta hate, so abusers gotta abuse. Do NOT give him your address! Notify the police that he is stalking you.

Yes, you read it right. TELL THE POLICE THAT HE IS STALKING YOU!

Your life is in danger. Being nice to abusers informs their twisted little minds that they got away with their abuse because you liked it!! No, I am not saying that you actually did like it, but that it is what he will believe. Rapists think this way, too -- that a silent victim enjoyed it and wants some more. Abusers are SICK, SICK, SICK, and they will NEVER RECOVER!!

File a restraining order. He will be given a written notice from the court that if he tries to meet up with you he will be arrested.

Thanks guys. I thought I would be excited that he called because I am lonely. Instead I feel creeped out. Kind of scared. I will trust my instincts and call the police.

The guy did some major stuff to you.

I'd stay clear away from him.

Tell him that, if he wants to apologize to you, he can do that online. Leave it at that.

That's horrible that he hurt you, Sarah. Why would anyone do that? You sound so warm and kind so anyone hurting you must be insane!

Please listen to what everyone else has already said here. Please cease any and all communication with him, tell him you have nothing more to talk about, that you've "moved on" and wish him the best and then never talk to him again, no matter how much you may find yourself drawn to do so in a "weak moment". I agree on calling the police, explaining his past history of abusing you and asking them for advice.

ANY level of physical violence/abuse against a person is totally unacceptable. Please realize that. You must realize that the physical violence he did to you isn't minor, it's major. It's not OK anywhere or for any reason. Did you Mom know about his history of abusing you?? Was she against you talking to him? If she was ambivalent or even for the idea of you talking to him, then shame on your Mom.

This is a big deal. For your sake, please handle it appropriately. You deserve safety and respect. We all do.

HEY, PEOPLE!!

She already said that she's calling the police.

Okay so I called the police and they werent much help. They couldnt find my case on file anywhere, maybe because I dropped the charges. They said if he doesnt go away after I ask him to leave me alone to call them. So it looks like I will be dealing with this myself. Which will be hard because he is a difficult person and will probably raise a stink when I tell him I dont want to hang out.

Lock your doors. Do not open them. Call the cops as soon as he arrives.

Do as Fnord says please. His advice is solid.

Call the police again, sometimes you just have a bad person or physically visiting the police helps a lot.

Wish you much luck. Wish I was there to keep you safe.

Im guessing that he gave his number to your mother and that she gave the information to you. He may have your phone number now because of call display when you phoned him. Block his number on your phone. He may then use someone else’s phone to call you, so for a while at least, don’t answer numbers that you don’t recognize. If you have voicemail, let calls like that flip over to messages. If its a genuine call they’ll leave a message and you can call back. If you end up talking to him again don’t give him your email address. He’ll only harass you that way. Don’t give him your home address and keep your door locked.

I’ve never been hit by a man, but I have been stalked. Take care. Have you ever taken a self defence course? You could learn some practical skills and it could give you confidence to keep him away.

Sarah, did you see my post?