Suddenly Hit by Brutal Epiphany

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This girl I used to work with that I was really into had been trying to get me to hang out with her and her friends on several occasions and I always turned her down due to anxiety. She has mostly female friends, so it would have been an amazing opportunity to meet potential dating prospects who'd have trusted me from the offset. Now she's dating another guy and we haven't spoken in months.

I finally realize I had the greatest opportunity in my life to bond with some women, even if just as friends, and I just let it sail by. I can't see it ever happening again. God I hate myself.

Welcome to the world of autism. Had the same realization a few years ago. Really cute 23 year old girl showed the same interest in me (i'm in my 40s so i didn't even consider her being interested in me). Also happened earlier in life but i was younger and too busy playing games on my computer.

Made me keep my eyes and ears more open to such signals...