"People don't drink/go out so much any more"

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Joe90
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27 Aug 2019, 12:12 pm

I hear this everywhere, but if this was true then I wouldn't feel like such an alien. I know a lot of people my age (including family members), and I can confidently say that only 3 of them aren't interested in clubbing or getting drunk - but they're not NTs (one has AS, one has autism, one has Fragile-X). But everyone else I know in my peer group all go out and drink, some on a regular basis, others just when on holiday or celebrating a birthday but still think drinking is great. People who get drunk outnumber the people who don't. I'm in the tiny minority of those that don't ever get drunk. Why I feel ashamed or depressed about it I don't know. But when people start talking about how they don't remember anything at the weekend or on vacation because they were too drunk, I just think "oh, another one who isn't afraid to get drunk". I actually can say that I have yet to meet an NT who has never been drunk or aren't interested in drinking. Most older people don't drink so much or have given up, but they still went out and got drunk when they were young.

It just feels like I have missed out on that part of my life where I'm supposed to go out and "have fun", being so the vast majority of people have. Most young people from around 16 to 40 live for drinking and bars, and when you're in that age group and you do not care for any of that s**t, you do feel like an alien.
And it's not true that people don't go out or drink so much these days, because everyone I know does. :roll: :cry:


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Sarahsmith
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27 Aug 2019, 2:49 pm

It may just be a cultural thing where you live because where I am not everyone drinks. I drink but it is alone in my room. How boring! You should be pleased with yourself for not going out drinking. I wish I could be like that. Drinking waists my money and makes me break out. I really look up to people who don’t drink.



lostonearth35
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27 Aug 2019, 3:11 pm

I have no desire to go out and drink. I don't touch alcohol. I hate how western society, which drinks alcohol the most, thinks it's okay to and even healthy to drink and you're not normal if you don't. Nearly all people who drink even in moderation have gotten drunk at one time or another. I hate that I'm supposed to feel incredibly ashamed and guilty for ordering a hamburger, but people can go get wasted at a bar and it's perfectly acceptable and seen as "normal" in our society. :x



Joe90
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27 Aug 2019, 3:14 pm

Yes, where I come from a lot of people look down on people who don't drink. I've been interrogated by people before, asking why I don't drink.

I just don't understand NTs and drinking. I understand more if people often have a few drinks of an evening at home, or when they go out with friends, but I'm talking more about getting really drunk. I just don't see the point.

I mean, NTs are afraid of people who act unpredictably, but getting drunk is considered socially acceptable by most, even though that makes you act unpredictably. I've been to see a movie on a Saturday night before, and when I was in the town waiting for the bus to go home, there were drunk people everywhere. They weren't all happily laughing and joking and singing. They seemed aggressive, argumentative, emotional, and doing very embarrassing things, crawling around the floor because they're too drunk to stand up, and putting themselves in danger. I mean, why do NTs like ending up like that? And I bet half of them were ill the next morning. But they go and do it all over again the next weekend.
It boggles my mind.

I know a girl who went to Italy for her 30th birthday, and I was really interested in what Italy was like, what foods she tried, what places she visited, etc. But all she said was, "I can't remember, I drank loads of alcohol every day", and when I asked why, she replied, "well, it was my 30th birthday." I don't understand that either, because they say "collect memories", but going abroad to get blotto isn't very memorable if you don't remember anything you did.


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Sarahsmith
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27 Aug 2019, 3:21 pm

That sounds terrible. I’m glad you’re not like them.



Caz72
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27 Aug 2019, 3:21 pm

I been drunk sometimes when i was in my late teens but i got really aggressive and hit everyone in the pub so ever since i havent touched alcohol and plus i have tummy troubles anyway


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kraftiekortie
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27 Aug 2019, 3:31 pm

I don't drink. I'm 58 years old. I have all the "social life" I need.

Why would a cop ask someone why they DON'T drink? That doesn't make sense, somehow. I'm not saying it didn't happen. I just wonder about the mindset of the cop.



Joe90
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27 Aug 2019, 3:46 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I don't drink. I'm 58 years old. I have all the "social life" I need.

Why would a cop ask someone why they DON'T drink? That doesn't make sense, somehow. I'm not saying it didn't happen. I just wonder about the mindset of the cop.


Where did you get the cop asking someone why they don't drink from?


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kraftiekortie
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27 Aug 2019, 4:42 pm

Sorry.....I confused "people" for "cop" for some reason.



Joe90
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27 Aug 2019, 5:10 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Sorry.....I confused "people" for "cop" for some reason.


That's OK.

I have never been interrogated by a cop in my life.


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28 Aug 2019, 9:56 am

Sarahsmith wrote:
I drink but it is alone in my room. How boring!


That's common in Finland, we even have a word for it: kalsarikännit. Literally it means "underwear drunk" and in practice it means drinking alone at home in your underwear or other very casual clothes that you wouldn't wear out in public.

But yes, they do say that here, too. It's not about there being more people who don't drink or get drunk at all, it means that not as much alcohol gets sold in bars, restaurants and stores.

But meh, I don't really care. Drunk people can be amusing to watch as long as they aren't agressive or invade my personal space. One of my cousins is very amusing when drunk or even just tipsy, but she tends to forget the meaning of personal space when she drinks... or maybe she's always like that, I'm not sure since I only tend to see her at parties these days.



Gentleman Argentum
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29 Aug 2019, 12:56 pm

Joe90 wrote:
I hear this everywhere, but if this was true then I wouldn't feel like such an alien. I know a lot of people my age (including family members), and I can confidently say that only 3 of them aren't interested in clubbing or getting drunk - but they're not NTs (one has AS, one has autism, one has Fragile-X). But everyone else I know in my peer group all go out and drink, some on a regular basis, others just when on holiday or celebrating a birthday but still think drinking is great. People who get drunk outnumber the people who don't. I'm in the tiny minority of those that don't ever get drunk. Why I feel ashamed or depressed about it I don't know. But when people start talking about how they don't remember anything at the weekend or on vacation because they were too drunk, I just think "oh, another one who isn't afraid to get drunk". I actually can say that I have yet to meet an NT who has never been drunk or aren't interested in drinking. Most older people don't drink so much or have given up, but they still went out and got drunk when they were young.

It just feels like I have missed out on that part of my life where I'm supposed to go out and "have fun", being so the vast majority of people have. Most young people from around 16 to 40 live for drinking and bars, and when you're in that age group and you do not care for any of that s**t, you do feel like an alien.
And it's not true that people don't go out or drink so much these days, because everyone I know does. :roll: :cry:


Drinking? You miss out on nothing. Upgrade your friends, find sober ones. It is better to be alone than to be around drunks. The drunks are the weirdos. They can't think of anything better to do than get wasted.


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Noca
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29 Aug 2019, 7:36 pm

Drinking just makes me tipsy, and tired, not more socialable. It's also really expensive. I don't like noisy environments and I don't like socializing more than 1on1 because I can't follow the conversations in groups of people. I have no desire to go to a bar, sometimes the food is nice in a pub but that's about it.



BDavro
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29 Aug 2019, 7:38 pm

I hate going out but I love getting drunk on my own.



naturalplastic
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31 Aug 2019, 9:56 am

When I saw the title I was gonna say that "folks don't go out drink so much anymore...because they stay at home and are on the internet all of the time." That on top of the fact that folks tend to out grow doing that anyway, but there always a few stragglers who still need to do that and who lament that their peers have out grown it, a will make that statement.

But it turns out that you're saying that folks who say that are wrong, and that folks still DO go out and get drunk- atleast in your neck of the woods. Must be a British working class thing.



Joe90
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31 Aug 2019, 12:00 pm

It's not so much my actual friends that drink, in fact all my friends don't drink (but I only have very few friends and they are not NTs). But it's people around me, like colleagues, neighbours, cousins, friends of friends, my boyfriend's nieces and nephews, etc, who are in their teens, 20s, 30s, who all seem to like to go out and get drunk.
Sometimes the conversation gets to "who's been the drunkest?" or "when was the last time you got really drunk?", and everybody but me can all relate and tell each other their experiences, while I sit there feeling like an alien. It just makes me feel boring, snobbish or wimpy.
Even people who I didn't think were bothered about getting drunk suddenly announce that they went out and got really drunk. It seems to be a must-do trend. I wish I could be proud of not being a drinker, but instead I feel depressed about it and it makes me feel left out.

I just wish I lived in a culture where only half the population drank alcohol and admired people who didn't. But the UK culture seems to be centered around drinking, and it seems to me that about 99% of neurotypicals aged between 16-40 like to be drunk.


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