I Know This Sounds Daft But...

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I have a fear. It is a feeling...

I am not sure if I will be assessed.


Now the thought or feeling?

This is the time I nearly had autism.

I know this strange thought and feeling may not make any sense. But somehow I felt that things could happen in the UK and everything will change and that an assessment will be the last thing on my mind or anyone elses? I don't know. But where will that lead me? I mean. Well. I will survive somehow. I know this. What condition I will be in I don't have a clue! A better position hopefully!
But I don't have a clue what will happen in the future and why I am feeling this way? And why am I writing this anyway? Just a thought and a feeling? And does it matter if I live or die? Does it matter except that I achieve all I am meant to achive in my life, be it that I am on the spectrum or be it that I am an NT. And I have not finished yet. I have a lot to do before my life ends. A whole lot to do. Many years to live. Many things to see. Many things to do. Many people to walk with...
So why am I writing this? I really don't know! Any ideas anybody? Haha!
Uhmmm. If you don't know Mr Mountain Goat, how will anyone else know?

Uhmmm. Well. As other people have said "Don't give up the day job!" I wouldn't mind them saying this, but it makes no sense. I don't have a day job!

So the future... How to go fron rags to riches? Can't be bothered. Hahaha! Money does not actually mean much to me. Moey is a tool. Without money one has to use ones hands to dig... With a little money one has a spade. Chuck loads of money at life, and one has a mechanical digger. Chuck lots more and one has a whole fleet of mechanidal diggers at ones disposal. Even more and one can even blow up a whole mountainside! But lets not go off on tangents here. What is the point to this thread? No point really. Just recording a feeling and thought that I have in the long road of waiting to be assessed. I could be assessed by the time I'm 90! Maybe 92! Hahahaha! Who knows. It just feels like a never ending road I am walking on where the start line of an assessment feels like it is moving away from me rather then towards me.
Do I need an assessment anyway? Not really. I have survived by slowly selling my posessions.. I have plenty more before I end up sitting in my bedroom naked having sold all my clothes and everything else I own! Ok. I'm being silly now! HAHAHA!

LAUGH AND THE WORLD PUZZLES WHAT YOU FOUND FUNNY...Shhh. Best not tell them! Hahahaha!

Ok. That's enough of this thread. Feel free to explore your own thoughts and feelings. I almoat feel like Michael Cain when at the end of the film Italian Job he said "Lads. I've got an idea..." Except I don't have an idea! Uhmmm. What am I on about? Anyone know? Haha!

MG you sound as though you are anxious. Did they call you about the support you are entitled to until your assessment date arrives? The waiting is difficult, don't drive yourself crazy, maybe start a new train project?

Not heard yet. Yes. Anxious... Yes.

I am concered incase I have been on cross purposes when I have been in touch. I am not sure. As when I am feeling like this my thougts can go all over the place as I start analysing things... Which is probably not a good idea.