I can't handle change

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Change is something that I have struggled with my entire life. I don't like having to adapt to a new normal or have disruptions in my routine. I like routine and structure. I always had problems with changing schools, such as going from elementary school to middle school, middle school to high school, and high school to college. I hate it when I lose loved ones to death and I hate it when something that I've been use to for all or most of my life suddenly comes to an end. Dealing with change gives me anxiety and depression. I graduated from college last year, and since Kindergarten, I had been attending school for 20 years. It does not feel right being completely done with school and having no assignments or exams. I, like most people, did not necessarily enjoy school, I just miss the routine of it. I really hate changes that I have no control over and didn't ask for. I am having a hard time dealing with all of the changes to everyday life that have been caused by this pandemic. I don't like having to wear face coverings, social distancing, and the cancellation of annual events. I just started a new position at a store that I've been working at for 9 years. I went from a packer to working night crew. The company that I work for does not pay well and does not allow for full-time work, but I've been there for 9 years because I have such a hard time finding work and because it is familiar to me. I'm having a hard time adjusting to this new position even though I am getting a few more hours and making a little more money. I'm having anxiety and depression just adjusting to a new position at the same place. It is possible that I may ask for my old job back because I am not sure I'm going to like this night crew job. My family has been pressuring me to get a better job, but they don't understand that I have such a hard time with change and that it is not that easy for me to find work.

You're right, there is so much to adjust to and it is difficult.

It seems like you're doing well, keeping your job going and you've made improvements too.

I've had a lot of changes and it takes me a while to adjust, I think that's normal for people on the autism spectrum.
I'm more prone to bouts of anxiety and depression during and after a change, until I adapt.
What can you do for headspace? Things that help you recharge?

Change is the only constant.

And not all change is bad. Often times, change is good! Even when you don’t like change.. sometimes accepting a new change is difficult and takes some time, but once it becomes a normal part of your life and routine you might just like it better - or at least tolerate it just the same as whatever the old routine was simply because now it has become routine.

You Could request your old role, but it might be better and healthier to just continue trying out the new one.. even if you’re outside your comfort zone, you’re still sorta in your comfort zone bubble of familiarity at the same employer so making yourself adapt to this new role might be a good exercise in learning how to cope with change. So much in your life is bound to change over the years, so just consider it a bit of “exposure therapy,” of sorts. Then you’ll come to learn that you Can in fact role with the punches and make it through times of change, and then the next change that happens, or that you make happen, may be easier to process.. like finding a different more lucrative job to do. Maybe this baby steps job role change is just what you need to get the ball rolling on bigger better changes in your life later and should be looked at as an opportunity or blessing vs difficulty or challenge?

I like good changes. Still pisses me off when people move my stuff so I can’t find it, though. :p But I tend to welcome bigger scale more valuable life changes vs avoid them.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Change is what allows you be here. If nothing changed, you could not have been born. If there was no change, you would not have been able to grow up and gain the ability to do all the things you enjoy.

Nobody likes the bad changes, but there are good changes too. Every time a new episode of your favorite TV show comes out , that is also a change!

A new job position with a new routine and new responsibilities can be tough to deal with. But somebody thought that you could handle the extra hours. Stick with it for a while and see if they are right.

Hang in there, we have _all_ been through so much!

IR

i save all my change. seriously though, pleasant change is good but there ain't enough of that kind in this world.

I like routine and do not like change. But when problems arise, I am fairly quick at finding solutions. I suspect my managers perceived this trait, so they always gave me the problem assignments. So over time I learned to accept change because I am very adaptable to change, much quicker than most NTs, and I just work through it.

I have worked night shift. It is a slower shift. Less supervision. But you will need to ensure that you receive adequate sleep. So you may have to modify your home to ensure minimal sunlight, very quiet conditions exist there. And limit interruptions. It is just a new routine to adapt to.

One of the advantage of night shift, is that you will be free during the daytime and that means that you can apply for a new job whenever you want, one that is more upwardly mobile, and not worry about skipping work in order to go to the interview.