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hurtloam
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20 Nov 2020, 7:19 pm

Stupid f*****g people. I f*****g hate them. What's so f*****g special about them?

I f*****g hate them.



Mountain Goat
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20 Nov 2020, 8:16 pm

Hurtloam. If I knew someone in your area who needs to meet a loving and caring person, I can think of no one better then you.


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Fireblossom
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21 Nov 2020, 7:18 am

As in, people who've simply fallen with someone or people who've fallen for someone and whose feelings are answered to?



hurtloam
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21 Nov 2020, 9:34 am

Couples. What's love without reciprocation.



hurtloam
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21 Nov 2020, 9:35 am

Mountain Goat wrote:
Hurtloam. If I knew someone in your area who needs to meet a loving and caring person, I can think of no one better then you.


Thanks.

I'm too ill though. No one wants a dead weight.



Mountain Goat
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21 Nov 2020, 12:17 pm

hurtloam wrote:
Mountain Goat wrote:
Hurtloam. If I knew someone in your area who needs to meet a loving and caring person, I can think of no one better then you.


Thanks.

I'm too ill though. No one wants a dead weight.


You are not dead weight. You have a lot going for you. You are an attractive lass with a nice predictable tempriment and have good character.

I too struggle to begin dating. I find that somehow I am the one left after everyone else has been chosen, but I am still hopeful that one day someone nice will find me and love me for who I am.

Care to join me on this shelf of life waiting for ones partner to come along and notice us? :D

The ones who wait are the gems who have the most love to give...

I was thinking that I would be suitable for a lady who has messed up in life and wants a man to call her own. (I don't feel worthy of the best. I just want to be loved. :) ).


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The_Face_of_Boo
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21 Nov 2020, 1:15 pm

You did your best in that area. I know that wouldn't make you feel much better tho, nothing would.



kraftiekortie
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21 Nov 2020, 1:23 pm

But why do you feel you’re “dead weight?”

It’s evident to me that you’re accomplished and smart.



hurtloam
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21 Nov 2020, 2:07 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
But why do you feel you’re “dead weight?”

It’s evident to me that you’re accomplished and smart.


I haven't got any energy to do much of anything at the moment. I'm really struggling with work. I'm having to re-think whether I can keep on working full time.

I have friends who keep asking me if I want to meet to go for a walk, but I'm too tired.



hurtloam
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21 Nov 2020, 2:08 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
You did your best in that area. I know that wouldn't make you feel much better tho, nothing would.


Yeah, you understand. Thanks.



Joe90
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21 Nov 2020, 2:27 pm

hurtloam wrote:
Stupid f*****g people. I f*****g hate them. What's so f*****g special about them?

I f*****g hate them.


I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I wish there was something I could do. :cry:


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Redd_Kross
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21 Nov 2020, 2:31 pm

hurtloam wrote:
Couples. What's love without reciprocation.


Most couples have a lot of reciprocation going on. And also kindness without necessarily expecting anything back for it, but just to be nice.

A mixture of the two is healthy, I would say.



hurtloam
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21 Nov 2020, 2:37 pm

Redd_Kross wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
Couples. What's love without reciprocation.


Most couples have a lot of reciprocation going on. And also kindness without necessarily expecting anything back for it, but just to be nice.

A mixture of the two is healthy, I would say.



I mean as opposed to some doofus in love with someone they can't have ska limerance.



The_Face_of_Boo
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21 Nov 2020, 2:50 pm

It's Saturday night, that's why you're feeling this now.



Redd_Kross
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21 Nov 2020, 3:25 pm

hurtloam wrote:
I mean as opposed to some doofus in love with someone they can't have ska limerance.


Well, you can't force anyone to love you.

But you can make yourself easier to love (as a fringe benefit), by working on your confidence and self esteem. From observation most relationships involve constant adjustments and allowances. Being confident enough to "go with the flow" most of the time, stay emotionally open and vulnerable, and sometimes make mistakes and laugh about them, seems key to coping with all that.

I've generally messed up my relationships by being insecure and anxious. It seems that in order to love and care about someone effectively you also have to be able to step back sometimes. It's definitely possible to smother people by caring too much and taking everything too seriously. So the whole thing is a juggling act.

If you're not happy with yourself you won't be happy with anyone else, either. That's an old cliche but it still happens to be true. So work on that first. It's amazing how many good relationships start between people who are quite content being single, thanks very much, and how few develop between people really desperate to pair up. If you're confident in yourself and your lifestyle, you don't *NEED* anybody else to feel complete, so the pressure's off. And you've also got the power to walk away from anything you're not 100% sure about. And if someone you really like doesn't feel the same, well then that's their loss isn't it? You're free to find someone better.



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21 Nov 2020, 4:47 pm

Quote:
If you're not happy with yourself you won't be happy with anyone else, either.


That's not strictly true. I used to hate myself and I still do beat myself up inside about Asperger's and struggle to accept myself, but I have been in a loving relationship with a man for over 6 years now and I seem to have a lot of love in me to give to him. So it's like I love other people more than myself, and can feel the love for others more than myself.


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