Parents who don't take your feelings seriously

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Does anyone else here have this problem? There have been so many times in my life where I tell my parents how I feel about something and they don't take me seriously. My dad does this more than my mom. They either are dismissive or argue with me about it. My dad even mocks me for my feelings. They do this even when I am in clear emotional distress, yet treat me like I was having a childish outburst or being immature. I still have this problem even though I am 25 years old now. This isn't just because I'm autistic. I have an older brother who is non-autistic but has had severe depression since he was a teenager, and they have treated him the same way. My dad refused to believe he was really so mentally ill for a long time. He thought my brother was just spoiled and immature.

Both of my parents failed to take my issues seriously when I was younger. They've been more than understanding since coming to understand the extent and how failure to address the problems (both as a result of their preferences and mine) contributed to the current situation.

I'd still rather they gave a s**t when it mattered.

My parents' first and very strong line of dealing with any problem was denial.

Would this be an appropriate time to offer a hug?

18 years ago would have been better but thanks

But I only signed up here 7 years ago...
And you only signed up 4 years ago.

I'll backdate it to your sign-up date and give you a few coupons redeemable as need be.

2002 hug:

{{{{{MAGZ}}}}}

Thank you both

Now let's take a moment to consider how much of humanity's combined problems are a result of bad parenting and the consequences of these poorly parented people interacting with each other.

I'm not saying there aren't other factors, I'm just saying it's up there with 'scarcity of needed resources' and 'inherent flaws of the animal in question' as a contributing factor.

Last edited by funeralxempire on 03 Mar 2021, 7:07 am, edited 1 time in total.

Do you know how stressful parenting is with such awareness?
And... overstressed parents are not good parents.
Catch 22.

I was about seven years old when I realized I wasn't ever going to be a fit parent. Everyone told me I was just being immature and that I'd outgrow it but I still believe it's among the most mature insights I've ever had.

I’m going on 36 and my parents are still belittling of my problems. Often times if I complain about something to mom I will get bitched and yelled at. It’s pushing me away from her. But maybe that’s a good thing because my parents are old now and won’t be around forever. They’re hard on me sometimes. But I still love them and will miss them when they’re gone. Also, they probably can’t help acting this way. They might be crazy. Lol

My parents are gone, and I mourn them for what we could have been -- a family like The Waltons.  Yeah ... I know ... it is a stupid fantasy, the past cannot be changed, and focusing on "What Ifs" will only make it worse.  But when I see how other families pull together and support each other well into adulthood, I feel cheated somehow.

My parents weren't like the Bradys or the Waltons, either....but they weren't terrible.

I was probably lucky I wasn't severely abused.

I never shared feelings with my parents.

I became mute, and I built walls behind walls -- behind walls -- to shut my emotions off from them.

I knew from a young age to guard my feelings, so they couldn't be invalidated.

I stopped sharing my feelings with my parents when it finally dawned on me that they were never going to do anything about the bullying and harassment I received from classmates and teachers at school.