Struggling to motivate myself

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I keep putting off tasks or panicking about doing a task. For example I have wet laundry to hang up but I really can't be bothered. When I do it I find myself rushing at it and cutting corners, just to get it done quicker. At work last night it felt like there were more coaches to clean than what there usually is (even though there wasn't), and I panicked inwardly. I just wanted to get them done quick so I could sit down and not have to think. But then when I did finish and sit down I felt bored and restless, especially that there wasn't much on the internet to look at (WP, why are you so dead lately???)

Is this depression? Mental fatigue? It's like everything is a huge mental effort and I feel really lazy but I don't think it is laziness. I never used to be this bad. Other people will think I'm lazy though.

ADHD probably?

see topics such as "performance anxiety" , "learned helplessness", Reactions to trauma (freeze), and articles on executive function ( which can come and go for many of us). Stress and distress, sudden demands, and sudden changes can throw us off. Self care always first! Sometimes we just need rest in order to have enough energy to devote to anything.

I have three things that it could possibly be: Depression
Burnout
Emotional Fatigue

I have been looking and replying to some of your posts and with all the anxiety and stress that you have been talking about I would hazard a guess on either Burnout or Emotional Fatigue(or a combination of both).

Depression is usually something that lasts for weeks, months, or years. Now if you have been battling depression(or have had it diagnosed before in your life at some point could be that.) But from just the post and previous ones I read I would guess Emotional Fatigue.

Yes, I think it is emotional fatigue, which can be just as crippling as physical fatigue, except most people don't understand emotional fatigue unless they're going through it themselves. They just think you're being lazy. I think having a repetitive job gives me emotional fatigue. I wish I was working with other people and doing a variety of tasks rather than the same mindless task day in day out. I've spoken to my supervisor but he won't let me do anything else and just tells me to stop whining. So there's nothing I can do there. Some days are worse than others. Some days I enjoy my work, then another day I can feel overwhelmed by the repetitiveness and just want to finish and sit down.

I've been feeling like this ever since my mum passed. Sometimes I just want to shut myself away and not go out, just get myself lost in movie DVDs. Sometimes getting ready to go to work is so draining, and I usually end up forgetting something I need. I'm glad I don't start work early mornings because I have a terrible time getting up. I used to have a job where I had to start early, and it was like torture to me. Nobody understood, because they know that everyone feels the same when having to get up early for work, but I felt it to a further degree. I work late afternoons/nights now but sometimes the dark can make me feel unmotivated, and sometimes I forget to charge my head torch which can make things rather difficult. I'm looking forward to the longer daylight hours coming.

Hi Joe, I'm sorry you're feeling this way. It's a familiar place for me, too. I saw on another board you were recently diagnosed with ADHD and I think I remember you said you felt more aligned with that diagnosis? Forgive me if I interpreted that incorrectly.

This sounds like emotional fatigue like another poster suggested or even an episode of autistic burnout, but also like some ADHD symptoms. It's tough to know exactly what to call it, even when you're the one experiencing it, which probably makes it harder to accept, or know what to do about it? At least, that's the way it works for me, but I recognize everyone is different.

I'm sure it's not laziness, though that doesn't help when that's how it comes across to the NTs in your life.

Is there a way you could reduce the stress in your life right now? Give yourself some time to rest? An ADHD coach might be able to help you find ways to do this that you might not have thought of yourself, if that's an option for you.

Do you have a launderette near you?

Maybe you could dry your clothes there.

I get good days and bad days. It might be due to depression. Today was a good day. I felt motivated at work and felt positive. But on another day I can feel more impatient and struggle to organise myself or feel interested in doing anything.

My clothes are hanging up drying now. I do it in the end.

How do ADHD meds actually work? Do they make a difference on your behaviour? Your mood? Your social skills? I quite like my ADHD self, as it's part of who I am. Will meds change me?

response to ADHD meds seem to vary with the individual. Some find them helpful, some find they hate them. There are so many medical alternatives today, and so many possible combos, you may find help in one or a combo. It usually takes time to find the right med and the right dose, a good doctor who listens to your input about side effects and what is not working for you, will be of great help in this. If you can find a specialist in ADHD, rather than rely on your GP, it might be more likely to succeed. Patience and persistence will help you find if meds will be an answer for you. Even with meds it might take therapy to learn new ways to live. Occupational therapy can help find new ways to do things that trouble you the most. Sending best wishes.

We can’t hang clothes outdoors on lines in winter. It’s too cold.

I guess you hang your laundry in your flat?
I can understand that being a pain in the bum.

We’re lucky our apartment complex has washers/dryers for a decent price.

It doesn't matter about the laundry. I hang it up inside, it's not the issue here.

It usually takes me a lot of psyching up to try new meds. Even the meds I'm on now took a a couple of years of hesitation and considering before actually going for it. I think I worry about side effects. I don't want meds to affect my sleep or digestion. I'm constipated enough as it is and sleep is unpredictable with me. No, I'm not going to start a special diet, as I don't believe in diets helping with your body clock.

Do I have to take meds, or is it just a suggestion? I suppose I will have to chat to a ADHD specialist first about meds. I'm a bit scared to come off Sertraline in case I start losing control of my emotions again like I did before. Rage outbursts are a huge turn-off.

Yep….probably a discussion with a psychiatrist who specializes in ADHD would be good.

As you know, medications work differently within individuals—but some work in ways which most people experience (e.g, some sleeping pills).

Nobody can make meds mandatory—except when you’re “sectioned” under certain circumstances.

That’s why I’m against somebody saying that one particular medication is a “cure-all.”

Why would you go off your Sertraline? You can take both.

Lots of adults with ADHD choose not to take meds, and there are both the stimulants like ritalin and adderall that everyone knows about and non-stimulants like Intuniv or clonadine, so there isn't an easy answer to any of this, it's just what works or doesn't work for you. I agree with what others have said, finding a specialist rather than just your GP would be best if you want to pursue meds.

One thing that I think is not commonly known about ADHD is that a huge component is also emotional dysregulation. We go from 0 - 60 instantly and it's hard for us to calm down, sometimes impossible. The "hyperactive" in ADHD doesn't just mean physically, because a lot of us are not actually physically hyperactive. But we are emotionally hyperactive. The ADHD stimulants calm that down for most people. So if you found an ADHD med that worked for you, it's possible you wouldn't need the other med. But again, since this is so subjective, that's only a possibility.

All ADHD meds help with focus, memory, patience, and as I said that calming-down of the emotions. Where I used to panic when presented with even minor problems, now I have the ability to take a deep breath and think through them. I'm also happier, where antidepressants never worked for me, because the stimulants are a big hit of dopamine right to your brain. But individual responses to them are so different that you'd have to try for yourself, and like all psych meds you just won't know unless you do. The nice thing is that they are very quick acting. Unlike your antidepressant, you'll see a difference within a day or two, probably within an hour, after taking it. You don't have to wait six weeks to know whether it will work.

You can google the side effects for yourself, but the most common are tension headaches, not being hungry, and insomnia, though for other people they can actually help with sleep. A good specialist should let you do a trial and let you stop pretty quickly if you don't like how they make you feel. Good luck!