I hate having a diagnosis from childhood (rant)

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I just hate having a diagnosis. I hated it the day I got it and I hate it now. I hate how the way my parents were basically threatened into getting me diagnosed when I was a child like it was a matter of life and death, it wasn't fair on them and it wasn't fair on me. It was like "your kid must get a diagnosis or else she'll be taken away from you and you'll be bad parents". Nobody else had to go through all that. My mum and dad's siblings all had normal children that didn't need a diagnosis for anything, not even other neurological disorders. Well, one of my cousins on my dad's side has autism traits but his parents weren't forced into giving him a diagnosis, they just were offered a bit of support for him without even needing a label. Why couldn't that be the case with me? Why couldn't I have just been told I have some autistic traits but not specified and still got some support with my school work and that's that? But no, it had to be no end of assessments, appointments, diagnosis, observations, social workers, child therapists, labels, and everyone and their brother was told... And it didn't answer anything. I was quite happy with who I was before I got the diagnosis, I had friends at school, I was fine. As soon as I got this embarrassing label I felt singled out. I feel so resentful about it. And if I had to be diagnosed with anything, I don't know why they didn't slap an ADHD diagnosis on me because that actually describes me better and is less shameful.

I'm Joe90, not Asperger's. But because everyone remembers I have Asperger's, they see me as Asperger's instead of an individual. I am so jealous of everyone here who wasn't diagnosed so early. Getting a diagnosis as a teenager or adult is much better because you're more mature enough to handle assessments and all that, and you can control more who you tell and basically you have more control over what you do with your diagnosis. With me, I was a helpless little 8-year-old and the diagnosis had to define me and follow me everywhere I went. It's too late to control it now, because everyone knows and remembers that I have it.

I am sorry you feel this way about your diagnosis. I wish I could help. I do have a question though: Are you sure that everything was actually "fine" before you were diagnosed? It seems strange to me that people would ask your parents to get a diagnosis for you and threaten to take you away from your home over something like a diagnosis unless they felt you were in some sort of danger(or possibly a danger to others...).

Have you talked about it with your parents? They may be able to give you a reason as to why that happened. Also talking to someone outside of the family(that you are REALLY close to) or a therapist may help to give you an objective view of your situation at that age because many times people go off of memory(which isn't always accurate) and feelings but, have a hard time looking at situations objectively especially when said thing brings emotional triggers. I know it will be hard to have to set aside your emotions but sometimes you have to so you can understand a situation and yourself better.

I'm not saying what happened in your life was yours or anyone else's fault but, the best you can do is to try and come to terms with your diagnosis and get the help you need to better yourself and have a more positive outlook on yourself and your life(past, present, and future).

I do not understand.
I mean, how does it work there? Why is there even a threat to begin with?



I have the near same double life myself. But there are no threats -- it just doesn't work like that here.
At home I was happier, more sociable... To be more precise, when I'm outside with neighbors. Without them, I seem to be just be in my own world.
At school it was a mixed bag of my own unpredictability.

I also have the same preferences against strictness. But I refused to be helpless even before I realized that I may be different.
I got enough social awareness to let myself get kicked out and escape because I don't have enough social skills to negotiate.

Yet I've known I stood out somehow around the same age range of 8, just not knowing it was being an ND.

I also had the same form of anxieties at school that had escalated into violent meltdowns.
And was enough to convince my parents to transfer me trice in elementary.

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Well I don't think anyone specifically said to my parents that I must be diagnosed or else, but they still felt threatened into it.

I just wish I didn't behave like a little f**k when I first started school, then I probably would have gone unrecognised, and only receiving some extra support with my work (other kids who struggled with their work still got extra support so I probably would have too but I would have been without a diagnosis).
I was just so embarrassed about it as a child and it's still stuck with me now. I think I would have been fine without a diagnosis. I would have had friends to help me along. Kids don't like other kids with labels.