Is it better to be a narcissist?

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I think most people, if given the choice, would prefer not to be a narcissist.
Why then, does a narcissist seem to have a far better life than someone with autism?
Take my parents.
My father was classic autist, my mother is classic narcissist.
My mother is rich, has a great house, car, friends etc. And seems to get everything she wants.
My father hardly spoke, couldn't socialise, couldn't hold down a job and ended up committing suicide.
My mother has a clear conscience because in her mind she can do no wrong, and she thinks she's amazing at everything.
She f****d up my life due to abuse and neglect, but she thinks she's been a model mother, and I'm the ungrateful child.
It must be wonderful to be so clueless.
And I'm here overthinking everything and still suffering from the trauma of that abuse decades later.
Is it better, then, to be a narcissist?

^I'm sick of being s**t Upon Raleigh.
But thank you.

I'm tired of you being shite upon too.

You are nothing like your mother.
Thank goodness. ^

That's why it hurts you so much.

Sending tea.

I don't think it's better to be a psychopath.

It's bothered me to see the perfect life one of my abusers has had, but I guess I try not to think about it. I tend to assume that karma will catch up with him at some point.

I'm sure it's not the same thing when it involves a parent though.

The word "Psychopath" gets chucked around a lot, to the point it can be hyperbole for somebody who is merely selfish. I suppose ignorance is bliss and if you can get through life only being bothered about yourself and your own desires and problems whilst feigning interest in other people when it benefits you to do so, then there probably is something to be said for that, however unpalatable it may be to the majority. You couldn't have a functioning society based on that value though.

Nobody would want to be a genuine psychopath in the true definition of the word, that's always going to end badly.

Not knowing the OP's timeline of events, I suppose it could be the case that the mother was deeply affected by the father's suicide on a level not necessarily apparent and that it impacted on her ability to parent properly, though the phrase "ended up committing..." implies that this most unfortunate outcome occurred later on. Either way, not something anybody should have to deal with - including everything that led up to it - and you have my sympathies. I lost a parent relatively young after complications with their marriage.

I read a blog by a psychopath. He says he has a somewhat tortured existence because he feels bad unless he can abuse someone. He can't always fulfil that urge.

The aphasia was strong in this one yesterday.
I meant NARCISSIST.
is it better to be a narcissist?
Sorry for the confusion.

Help!

It's still better to be a Raleigh.

I like to read what I wrote and have it be a total surprise to me.

I never remember anything I write after my sleeping pill.
That's about a three hour window after 2 am.

Thanks to mags for amending this thread

i dont know if im narcissist or its just the autism

i dont care about other people except my son and partner but its not in a heartless way its just i find it difficult to build up that sort of social bond with people and its exhausting to have to be friends with people
im happier on my own pleasing myself

people are too emotional and get offended too easily its hard to know what to say and what not to say
i find it hard to feel guilt or embarrassment like after a meltdown
.and many other emotions i should feel but unable to in the right situations

why is social things so hard

There were times I would wonder if I was a narcissist, but my mom (who is a therapist) explained to me that I'm not one because I genuinely do feel bad if I think I've hurt people. Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Psychopaths never actually experience guilt and I do. Whatever bad behavior I did was just due to the mania and psychotic episodes I experience.

Anyways I don't believe every narcissist truly has it as great as people might think. While the idea of not being attached to other people might be attractive (because let's face it many humans in this world can be cruel and selfish), the fact is these people still want the attention and company of others but because they'll hurt others and never really apologize due to a lack of guilt they often end up alone and it can make them miserable.

Look at Donald Trump for example. Despite his bizarre cult following and the way he manipulates his way out of legal trouble every time I doubt that man has any true allies or friends who love him. Everyone close to him politically has just been using him as a means to an end to gain more political power for themselves. And Trump himself is aware of this you can tell by the expression on his face. He's one miserable son of a b***h and he knows his days are numbered.

Sure if you're a narcissist you might have the cut-throat attitude required to gain wealth and rise to power. But is that really worth it to you if it means ultimately having more enemies than allies?

Basically what I'm trying to say is that these people may appear to superficially have it all but in reality they end up living a lonely existence.

The reason I believe this is because I've read comments on quora from people diagnosed with anti-social personality disorders who despise expressing no compassion or empathy will admit that they do feel it's a lonely and miserable experience.