Why do I see the same pattern of milestone achievements?

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What I mean is how come I still see people seemingly doing things at a certain stage of life when I have not really done them at the same time as them. I know everybody is different and achieves things at different times of life but I can't help but feel that I still see people doing things such as passing their driving test and driving their own car at 17, graduating from university in the early 20s, getting married with a long term partner and having their first child in their late 20s or early 30s etc. I passed my hazard perception test at 27 and passed my driving test and first drove my own car at 28, got my first paid job at 26, never graduated from university and have stayed single through my mid/late 20s and now in my early 30s.

It can make a person feel rather left behind. It's hard not to feel that way when certain things in life are held.up as an ideal.

I still think however that everyone's life is unique (in the sense that it unfolds for each of us differently) and that we can't really measure our lives against someone elses. I don't think not having all the milestones means we are.less some how. Just different.

..because a typical pattern of milestone achievements exists and most NT people adhere to it ?

You're not nuts. That's a very real thing. Congrats, you're observant!

So, what about it? You're not NT, I'm not NT, most of us here aren't and don't follow typical patterns of things like this. Whoopdeedoo.

This^

Nobody can help you. You got to help yourself.

By your age most people have achieved the milestone of not posting on an internet forum twice a day day after day to say woe is me. Why don't you reach that milestone yourself today?

I never went to university. I passed my driving test at 20 but never had a car. I got my first paying job at 22.

It sucks when you struggle with these things in life. But at least you're driving a car now, it doesn't matter what age you started. Finding a girlfriend can be difficult for guys on the spectrum, sadly. But not impossible.

Turn the question around, and you will have your answer.

How come you have not done the same things you see other people doing at the same stages of your life?

The answer to that question will explain everything.

When I was 17, my dad did try and persuade me to learn to drive but I found it very hard to focus keeping my eyes on the road and doing the gears and stuff at the same time in a manuel car, I tried again at 21 and still found hard to drive a manuel car without stalling in the middle road until eventually I at 24 I got given lessons in an automatic car which seemed more manageable for me and I had a female instructor I felt more comfortable than my previous instructors who were male. That shouldn't have been a problem but I was worried about them getting impatient, angry and frustrated if kept making making mistakes on the road in a manuel car. I failed my hazard perception tests about 13 times because of misunderstanding when to know when a hazard could occur on the road and until eventually I passed and I only failed once on my driving test and now obviously I drive.

When I was 18, I left school and didn't go straight to university but went to college to do art and design for two years and didn't go on to university until 22 and I was only there for three or four months and eventually was persuaded to leave due to stress of work there and not being able to catch up with the rest of the class.

I was 26 when I got my first paid job but I did do some voluntary work at 21 in a few charity shops to gain some work experience but when my dad moved house to my stepmum's house, I was persuaded to find work in the county where my stepmum lives and I had several interviews there but a part of me felt like not wanting to get a job somewhere I'm not familiar with. I also found myself not really wanting to get a job in somewhere like McDonalds because it didn't seem ''ideal'' for me even though I know its just a job like any other but in the end I found work in a shop in my home county now that I seem to like working in which sells books and stuff.

I've never been in a proper relationship probably because someone I did like didn't want a relationship with me only a friendship and there was someone else I met I quite liked and had some things in common with me but I didn't feel quite ready to want a relationship with her even she seemed eager but I wasn't. Instead we remained friends but were a long distance from each other and I didn't drive at the time to see her often. So far I haven't met anyone else yet and have tried to befriend someone I haven't spoken to for ages and have tried by sending birthday cards, christmas cards and so on and I still haven't had a reply from her. This must obviously explain as some of the reasons why I still haven't got a partner and I don't know if its just because I've just been unlucky.

All people do. Unspoken milestones seem to be set by society probably to try and push people and nothing more. Nothing wrong with this as I guess it has its purpose. A society who sets no achievements will achieve nothing.

This isn't however to say age plays a factor. I think whether these milestones are reached at all matter more and not so much she. Even then, each to their own. Having a family isn't for everyone, having a house or car also isn't for everyone and so on.

Now there is the understatement of the week!