I sometimes seem to hate being autistic

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I know hate sounds like a strong word to use but that's how I feel right now. I feel like I like sometimes I hate the way I sound if I were to hear the sound of my voice as though it doesn't sound like the "usual" voice of someone, I seem to think it sounds like someone trying to mimic or act another person's voice and it sounds odd.

I even seem to feel like I'm spoken about by other people as though I'm someone who has special needs like for example my mum telling her partner that I don't like something done a certain way and it makes me feel I'm being treated still like a kid even though they've denied that they do and spoken to like all other adults.

I am learning to sort my emotions, and that helps! I hate certain parts of being autistic. Some parts of it are so frustrating! I am learning it is OK to be frustrated and angry.. something I was trained to hide from a very young child. Now I am old, 72, and just learning how to identify my emotions and trying to uncover them and recognize what I am feeling. Just being told it was OK to have feelings has really changed things for me. You are definitely not alone. Just being alive is hard enough, and being autistic can make things even harder. Hope you are doing better right now.