internet forums bad news?

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im sure alot of forums are great and do alot of good, but everysingle one i get on i always say im leaving only to return. now normally this wouldnt be a problem but it reminds me of my school days and makes my depression worse because i just feel so terrible comming back time and time again, i have pinpointed that i do this because i have no friends irl, and dont have the skills to go out and make friends, so the visious cycle of this leaving/returning never ends.

any advice/help would be great.
thanks.

I don't know what to suggest...as you know, I have done exactly the same thing and come back, for the same sort of reasons, though I do make the occasional, short lasting friendship.

Is there nothing you can do to socialise more ? Any groups or societies you can join?

I don't know what to suggest...as you know, I have done exactly the same thing and come back, for the same sort of reasons, though I do make the occasional, short lasting friendship.

Is there nothing you can do to socialise more ? Any groups or societies you can join?

well im sure there is but i just have no motivation, so i just sit at home watch a bit of tv obsess over my sportscards and meteorite and get online. do you think electric shock treatment would rewire my brain and make me abit more normal? im gonna ask around about it.

I kicked a multi-year-long ADD message board habit...only to replace it with Tribe.net...which got replaced by WP....

I guess a better subject title would be: "How does one stop an obsessive interest that causes more pain than happiness?". Or shorter: "How to kill a bad obsession?".

I do not know but I would think there has to be some science on that subject some where.

I think that people with AS naturally gravitate toward forums because, as horrible as many people in forums can be, it still beats trying to relate to people in person or on the phone.

Generally, I have an awful time in forums because other people not only disagree with me, but many have zero understanding/respect/tolerance for the way I think. It is so bad that people in a few forums bash and ridicule me when I'm not even posting there. I don't have that problem at all here though.

Studied the issue and thought about it. I think obsessive interest maybe like any other addiction. You get a reward form it so you want to return to the interest. But like heroin its has bad side effects. Your at the stage where you see it as a problem. Thats always a good sign in recovery.

But I guess we have to consider that the addiction will be on the level of smoking, heroin, crack, etc. I know they tell recovering addicts to avoid their old friends who are addicts. In many ways being an isolated aspie keeps you stuck in a world where your surrounded by your same old fellow forum addicts.

That leads to the first suggestion .Granted it will likely be hard:
find friends IRL. That way you will reduce your exposure to the other forum addicts.

A possibly medical solution is Naltrexone.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naltrexone

Its used to treat opiate and alcohol addiction. Its under study for treating autism spectrum issues.

http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/ ... 081707.php

I like having you around here, guy, ain't nobody else got quite the same perspective.

I'd like to try being normal, but I'm not.

Reality is nice to look at, but there ain't nobody there.

My dog treed a bear last week. That was pretty cool.

I say no to wires and drugs.

I do not know about the past and other places, only seen you around here, and you have changed for the better.

I have looked into this friends thing, I like to study the natives. It is an ever changing group dependency.
The life cycle of a friendship is about a school year, and school friends do not carry over to after school.

Most humans are older, and friends are from work, church, and it seems to be no more than knowing people's names. When other people do the same in public, due to neighborhood, class, economics, it is called "Gang related activity." Even then, you have to join the Mafia to get lifetime membership, and that might be a short life.

My view on love is the same, two people fall in love when they discover that they each see the other as less worse than all the others. Couples quickly dump their single friends. It is a gang of two, and they might play with other couples, but not if danger is seen. Couples like couples that are worse, hence do not offer the change option. Couples that are spliting are suddenly a danger to all other couples, they have to go back and play with the singles.

Normal is being alone. Same sex groups are ever changing, the guys, the girls, that gather for mutual protection. Most animals do the same. Many species do the mated pair dance. Humans have a few more, education, work, common pre defined world view, from god. Sports are social groupings without content.

Many join the uniform services because they want to belong to something larger than themselves. It does show a higher degree of health, mental control, and gives them a common background, even when they have nothing else in common.

Others join in smaller groups around and idea too large for one. Common dreams united Microsoft, Apple, before they were profitable. Gates and Baummer, Jobs and Walzackni, shared a vision. Most small business chokes because it can not get beyond the founder, and family. Many a great family business could have gone worldwide, except for people.

I know several people who make a living in sports cards and rocks. Strangly enough they are some of the few people I visit. I do rocks. They have no friends, and the people they hire have no friends. There are several million of us older aspies. They are white, their wives are Native American, Honduran, or Asian.

Not having friends I was perfect for management. The workers complained, and I told the boss, it is you they hate, but do not dare complain, me they can let off steam with, and I do not care what they think. We make good middle management.

My line was from Repo Man, "Look at them, ordinary people, I hate them."

I think we share something coming to WP. Some people are becoming real to me, people are like me. I have changed. Kind words and good advice come from me?

I see the same in you, real life has it's problems, most of which are a memory of a long gone past. Something about WP is a world we were alway denied. I have a homeworld, where people are like me, and I want to get along with them and be of value.

It is also getting to me in seeing the world as defective aspies. On the, Why is it becoming popular? Thread.
Perhaps it is because we know the facts and tell the plain truth. That we lack the social manipulation. We are the oposite of politicians. No one has to guess what we really mean.

During both WWI and WWII Congress was voted out of office. Both times a very lying group of the manipuative had been in office for decades, and in the next election they were replaced by men who ran factories and made payrolls. Social stress drives the herd to seek new leaders.

We are now in a neverending worldwide war against a shadow enemy. On the home front gas is $3, some people are losing their jobs and homes, and everybody is starting to notice the price of gold, the fall of the dollar, and now their house is dropping in value. The last election was based on fear, and the next one will be fear of another kind.

You do not join in when it conflicts with your values, but you still see value, so you come back. I see an honest person who is growing in understanding. Aspies have some common values, and they are the ones the herd is seeking. Alone and isolated we are not much, but WP is bringing enough together that we are forming a culture, and are not just a medical problem.

I would vote for you because you are consistant and improving.

I used to do that too, announce I was leaving, and then come back. Now I just leave for a while, then come back without telling anyone. It seems to work. I leave because I feel I get too attached to this place and have days where I spend too much time here. And I come back because I miss the people, and the fact that it is OK to be fully Aspie here

Do you feel it is a negative thing for you to be here? How about setting yourself a time limit at WP, would that be helpful? Sorry I have no advice about making friends. I don't find it impossible but I have never found it easy, and the few real friendships I do have IRL, I have no idea how I made them.