I'm tired of being alone.

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Well, I am in quite a state at the moment. I have a few friends but I still feel like there is this wall up between me and other people and it seems like I will never find another person who really understands me. I am 37 and single and maybe realistically I should give up on finding a life partner or someone to marry but it's hard to give up on this dream. I tried meeting someone on wrong planet but I got one response and I corresponded with him for about two months and in the last month we talked on the telephone several times and then all of a sudden he stopped returing my e-mails and phone calls. I may be on the autism spectrum but I am not a robot with no feelings. I don't have to have a big crowd around me but I wish I had someone to sit down and eat dinner with and someone to come home to every day. I am so tired of sitting down to dinner alone every night. I do go out and do things but it's still lonely. Sometimes I'm so lonely that it feels like there is a big black cloud hanging over me. Has anyone else experienced such intense loneliness? How do you deal with it?

I usually go out to eat by myself, or go do something else. I often exercise or do some sort of project. Also, I am currently a full-time college student, and I keep myself busy with working on my degree (in geology).

Tim

autisticstar, meet Tim_Tex. Tim_Tex, meet autisticstar. If you don't take a chance, you will never know, so why don't you start PM'ing one another and find out whether you can at least be friends? Who knows...

I've felt like that too and hoped to meet a nice woman here on wrongplanet.

I eventually realised that wrongplanet is the wrong place to do that.

People come on here for all sorts of reasons and mostly don't put any details of themselves in their profiles.

You need to post yourself on a dating site.

On a dating site you know that everyone is available and wanting to date, their profiles will tell you their age and a bit about them.

Many will also post a pic so you can see if you might like the look of them before you make contact.

I have posted myself on Disabled United

There are a few people their with aspergers but most are NTs who understand what it is like to live with a disability.

If you post there you will see me (I'm tim7).

I don't know where you live but there are a lot of people there from the US as well as the UK where I live.

I met one woman through the site and although I'm not sure whether this person is right for me meeting them has given me more confidence that it will happen for me eventually.

Last edited by Asparval on 12 Sep 2007, 4:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I did meet my current BF at 39.Before that I never had a relationship that lasted over a year before things went..."wrong".I met him on a dating site but I think the thing that brought us together was that I was really honest about myself...no games,no images.I was sick of people trying to change me and felt that I could actually survive outside of a relationship,so I didnt feel"desperate",just open and curious.

He shares a lot of my aspie traits and has stayed true to letting me be "myself",even seems to like "myself" .That's a first for me.He isnt perfect either and we share enough "oddity" and have enough flaws to be able to except each others.So,it's not impossible.I wish you luck but sometimes being alone IS actually better then being in bad relationships...the world is full of those.

Personally, I don't mind being alone... Sometimes solitude can bring peace of mind. (Yogis and buddhist monks may take advantage of that solitude for meditation and payer)

so, (in my opinion) solitude is not always a bad thing...

PS: That makes two of us. I am also a geologist... (soon graduating with an M.S. degree in Sedimentology)

Most AS people excel in the siences, or are very clever at what they do (i.e. are like geniuses). Isn't it?

Ain't got no answers, but I sure know what you're talking about.

Autisticstar, I may be rushing in a bit fast, but...


Me, MADDuck and username88 are planning on sharing an apartment in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, and we need at least 3 more people. We were worried we would have more guys than women in the group! So you have a life down there? Do you like it? No? You seem a PERFECT fit! MADDuck is 35, and I don't wanna sound blunt, but I think I could hook you two up, since I already have username88.

I think this is that ever present yearning to find someone like ourselves...someone once told me though, that in seeking someone totally understanding and like ourselves, we are actually seeking to understand ourselves.
They say that those who understand themselves and have come to terms with who they are, are much happier in solitude...more able to cope with it.

Having said that, I have spent my entire life wanting that so called soulmate relationship...someone so like me that they are almost a part of me.
I have no suggestions other than to spend the time you are alone, working on making yourself the best you can be so that when you do meet the 'right' person, you are ready.

Try to find an Aspie support group in your local area. And if there isn't any, you could either start one up or take a small vacation and try to find the closest one to you.