Slander!

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Ever been SLANDERED?


That's how I feel right now.


My mother made it seem like I would need a lot of improvement before I could even marry--"Perhaps she will even marry someday."


There are people here I can marry eventually. Wonderful people.


f**k you, Darlene.

I agree, that's a weird thing to say.

Yep! But I am too freakin' exhausted to even consider dealing with it. I removed my daughter from her old school, partway through the year, as they were terrible to her. In doing so, the school argued my every move, so I began writing them up and sending letters to the board of ed. Eventually it got so ugly that I requested all written material that concerned my daughter and by law they had to provide it. It took months, but I got EVERY email, letter, note, incident report, mtg minutes, etc and I was absolutely appauled at the BS that they concluded, to make me look like an incompetant ass of a mother because they could do there F-ing job!

After years of treating my daughter like a behavioural concern and monopolizing their time, trying to shove her into a behavioural class and refusal to listen to me when I told them what we were dealing with, they decide they are suddenly going to become Dr's and discuss my "anxiety issues", "inability to cope" & "post-partum depression" based on no medical facts or findings. They even went as far as saying that I "didn't really care for my daughters needs and that I was too busy agency shopping to do anything about her behaviour" and continued to say that they had referred us to a centre that we had refused (with a sound reason~it was for kids with conduct disorders) and said that it was because we were "trying to hide some form of abuse within the family"! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! ! *gasp*

Yes! I hear you my friend. I know ALL about slander!




Sorry it was so awful for you.

Last edited by makelifehappen on 20 Oct 2007, 1:21 am, edited 1 time in total.

I hope that your daughter is having a better school life in her new school. Personally, I would have been really pissed off and would have considered taking those e-mails, letters, reports, ect to my attorney and suing the slimy worms but I can fully understand that you want to have nothing more to do with them.

Thank you. Really. This new school seems good enough, but clueless about ASD's, IEPs, etc!

Believe me, if it weren't for my just returning back to work after a year long maternity leave, getting all the supports and services in place for my newly dx'd daughter, dealing with realization that I have gone nearly 30 years thinking I was "normal" (haha~bloody madness!) and getting ready for my assessment for asperger's on Monday, sorting our 10 week old foster child, facilitating access with the bio-parents and accomodating for his needs, while we struggle to sort of this BS immigration so that my partner can finally become more than just a visitor in this country and finally be allowed to work...then I would have DEFINITELY hired a lawyer!! !! !

Bastards!

Ana, you're my friend, and I care about you... That said, I do not believe the statement about you needing a lot of "improvement" is entirely incorrect. Sorry. There is no indictment here, or condemnation, no blame. But, you must agree with this - you are highly unstable, no? Your self-described mental state is a "mess". I would say that you are un-centered, and I know you are already seeking desperately to center yourself. But as you try to center yourself, I see you whirling around your center like a tempest... And, I daresay it may be difficult to forge a meaningful relationship with a tempest.

I used to be a lot like you, in certain ways; madly trying to find my center; at your age I was a "mess" also. Time and experience helped me find my center, as I hope they will for you. I cannot claim to be perfectly centered myself, but at least knowing about my center helps me orient myself. And I can still be seriously knocked of center when hit hard enough; anyone can, actually; but now at least life's lessons aid me in re-centering with celerity.

Get yourself centered, dear. Sorry to be vague, I cannot tell you exactly what that means; it is something you must discover for yourself. Please do keep in mind, you are young, so young; time and experience... I believe you could use a bit of time and experience. But just being given these will not be enough, for it is you who must use them to temper yourself into a stronger person, to learn how to heal and center yourself... And, you do already have time and experience at your disposal - are you sure you've used what you already have to temper yourself?


Any "improvements" that might be beneficial aside, I do think that you have it in you to be a wonderful mate for someone. I've even tried playing matchmaker for you, if you recall. I'm not entirely sure what the hell your mom is talking about, and I know ever so well about the "over critical" parent syndrome. But I have always been awed by your energies and openness, as well as the spirit of the healer that dwells within you. Despite getting your ass kicked by depression and a sh***y life all of the time, you still manage to find more energy to expend in a single day than I can typically summon in an entire month. What did Graelwyn call you, "like a squirrel on speed"? I like to think of you in those terms, and in a good way, an endearing way. I think you simply need to focus this energy, but on what, I do not know. I note much of it is focused here on the WP, and perhaps that is not such a bad thing. You have many friends, many "fans" here. My own life is richer for having known you; you have touched me, and you have touched many others. I even chased off a troll for you recently. (And had fun doing so. Haha, "Don't feed the troll!" OK, how about I crack her/him with the Stark Fist of Retribution(tm). Bye, bye, troll.)

You are imperfect, as are we all, but you are also a thing of great value, great worth. I know not how to help you; but I am pulling for you, pulling hard.

Good fortune,

- Icarus knows to use acid and fire on trolls, lest they regenerate...

Ana, it's really bad to get that from your parents. The last time my father made a seriously hurtful comment I punched him and since then he's been much nicer. I wouldn't recommend that course of action, though.

I've definitely been slandered before...

It's much worse when it isn't to your face, at least for me. I remember when I went to a special ed school most of the teachers hated me and actually went through an elaborate attempt to frame me. One teacher actually kept a little black book of all my little misdeeds. They gave me preemptive detentions before I had even done anything and at that point hell broke loose. That wasn't so bad because when I realized that everyone was against me, and the teachers didn't have enough respect for me to hide it, I intentionally got myself expelled and had fun in the process, I was a legend at that school several years later I have since learned.

Now I'm in college and there is a student lounge right next to my room where I sometimes hear people in it saying things about me through the wall. After what I've heard I now know that I have no hope of ever making a friend here. It really sucks.

If it softens the blow, I believe everybody needs a lot of improvement. We're only human and should be constantly striving for improvement, anyway.