"Friend" being competitive over grieving?

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EDIT: There's really no point in leaving the original post here if people aren't going to respond to it in revelant and respectful ways.

Aspies tend to take relationships more seriously than non-Aspies from what I can tell. We tend to put more thought into what we say and do and possible consequences, even though we get it wrong sometimes. It means that non-Aspies tend to say things as they think them and Aspies tend to assume it was planned to sound the way it did.

Yes, she's being damn insensitive and totally thoughtless, but it's may not be deliberate.

That being said, people do suck.

You honestly think that she can be changed?

I think it's naive to think that, she probably doesn't care about you at all and only wants to compete with you. The best way to deal with it is in my opinion let her know that what she's doing is extremely rude, if she reacts badly she's likely fake.

Why do people let other people walk over themselves like you have?

If I was in that situation, I would have cut off contact with the "friend". I only choose to spend my free time around people whose company I enjoy, people who put me in a good mood. That person would make me feel bad, so I would end the friendship.

I agree with evilkim. Don't email her anything. Block her. Right now, don't interact with anybody who makes you feel that way.

I think that you should block her, as well.

Sid :O)

I would avoid her for now. It's called Self Preservation. When you are grieving, it is very important to block out anyone who adds to your emotional burden. I had to do this with a friend, because she seemed to be playing one-up games with everything I said. I tried to ask her to stop, but she seemed to enjoy arguing by e-mail, telling me that I could cure my autism if I really wanted to, etc. So - that was the end of that. She tried to e-mail me again after about six months, I responded briefly. She immediately tried to set up a time to get together. I said no, and blocked her. As another poster on here said, only allow people in your life who are helping you to feel good, not bad.

hi

Sorry to say it, but she's a crap friend and frankly sounds like a crap person. Not just for trying to one-up you because she needs the spotlight, but for telling you that your "deal" couldn't be AS. She is discounting you as a real person, and you shouldn't stand for it. Focus on yourself, and surround yourself with people that will give you strength, not make you feel weak.

I am sorry for your loss, and I truly wish you the best in the days ahead. Take good care of yourself and your mom, and don't let other people's selfishness tear you down.